What happens to romantic trees on Valentine’s Day? They get all sappy.
What did the tree say after someone hit it? We should really call the copse.
A bunch of chill-dren from the neighborhood played all afternoon in the snow.
How do two rival forests get along? They sign a peace tree-ty!
What do snowmen wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
Why did the lettuce and the mushroom break up? The lettuce was pretty but the mushroom did not have much room for her in his life.
You can’t predict wind speeds with certainty. The best you can do is make a gust-imate.
I have a hiking playlist with songs from the Peanuts, the Cranberries, and Eminem. I call it my trail mix.
What is worse than when it is raining buckets?
Hailing taxis.
Did you hear about the scientist who was lab partners with a pot of boiling water?
He had a very esteemed colleague.
How does Santa look after the grass on his three gardens? Ho, ho ho.
What did the eskimo say when he chopped down a tree?
Tim-brrr
What did the snowman and his wife put over their baby’s crib?
A snowmobile!
What happens before it rains candy? It sprinkles.
What does a flower do when they get caught in a lie?
Backpetal.
I mist say, this is a pretty bad joke, but it haze potential.
I'm trying to think of a weather pun, but my mind's kinda cloudy now.
Why did the River need Jesus? It was dammed.
Why did the girl walk into the ice cream store with an umbrella?
She heard there were going to be sprinkles
What is the name of the car that passes through the narrow stream of the river? Fjord.
Why does the mermaid wear seashells?
Because she grew out of her B-shells.
What did the river sue for?
Beaver damage.
What do you call a storm that's raining cats and dogs?
A furricane
My friend has just won the tallest Christmas tree competition
I thought to myself, 'How can you top that?
Where does seaweed look for a job?
In the kelp-wanted section
I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
I read a bunch of news articles dealing with lightning strikes recently.
I'm trying to keep myself knowledgeable about current events.
Why are geologists great dates?
They can make your bedrock.
There's snow place like the mountains in winter.
What is the most depressed river in Southern Europe? The Crimea River.
Why shouldn't you smoke weed during a thunder storm?
Because lightning strikes the highest object.
Q: What did the wind turbine say to the engineer after he fixed him?
A: I’m a big fan of your work!
What did the bride say to her new husband at their wedding? - I love you so mush-groom!
Did you hear about the aspen who fell for the loggers’ scam? The copse wood not believe she fell for it.
How did the fire ant feel after the rain storm flooded his home?
Very put out, indeed!
Why did the frog lose his job on the mushroom farm? He stole the toads-tool.
How do the Skywalkers like their bath water?
Luke-warm.
Where do flowers recharge? At a power plant!
Diving into shallow water could lead to jumping to wrong conclusions.
What was one raindrop overheard saying to another? Two's company, three's a cloud.
Why was the Blonde fired from the M&M factory?
She kept throwing away the W's.
The forager was in such mixed moods this morning and we guessed he picked and ate the wrong class of mushrooms.
How heavy is a rainbow? It's actually pretty light.
I guess you could say that things hit by tornado's are blown up.
What do flowers study in college?
STEM.
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white? Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
Q: Why was the cloud not allowed to cross the border?
A: Because it was a for-rainer
What do you call a big fish that makes you an offer you can’t refuse?
The Codfather.
I dropped my steak into the fire.
Well done, me, well done.
A friend of mine is his team's best footballer on paper. Unfortunately, they play most of their games on grass.