Why are small dried up river beds so cool? Because they're ex-stream.
How are bad school grades like a shipwreck in the Arctic Ocean? They're both below C level!
What is a tornado's favorite movie? Gone With the Wind!
Why can’t minerals ever lie? They’re always in their pure form.
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing?
Au revoir.
My friend asked me how big the ocean is.
I said "can you be more Pacific?"
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on your doorstep? Matt. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean?
Bob.
I used to make loads of money clearing leaves from lawns. I was raking it in.
What happens when you go to the beach in hell?
You get a SaTan.
Water you doing?
Did you hear about the mother who gave birth to her baby while she was in the sky?
I guess you can say the baby was airborne
How do geologists like to relax?
In rocking chairs, of course!
Why aren’t trees competitive sports fans? They like to root for everyone.
How was the snow globe feeling after the storm?
A little shaken
The river turned out to be a great party guy because he just went with the flow.
The main difference between the weather and a horse is that one rains down while the other is reined up.
My dad hates the ocean, but the other day he bought a boat.
He never could resist a good sail.
Why did the Platanus occidentalis have to go to the doctor more than the other trees? Because it was always sycamore.
What do you call water that is good for you?
Well water.
What’s an ig?
A snow house without a loo!
I went to the shooting range for the first time, but I couldn’t get my gun to fire
I had to read the trouble shooting section in the manual
HIJKLMNO is the formula for water
H to O.
What do you say when the beach asks you to walk on it?
Shore
If the sun shines while it’s snowing, what should you look for?
Snowbows.
Q: What did the wind turbine say to the engineer after he fixed him?
A: I’m a big fan of your work!
I had a dream the ocean was filled with orange soda
It was a Fanta sea.
What is the most favourite drink of a cow? Mountain Moo.
There are so many puppies and kitties around the neighbourhood. Perhaps it is because it has been raining cats and dogs for hours.
What do you call a big fish that makes you an offer you can’t refuse?
The Codfather.
The stormy weather affected my ability to remember my alphabets. I remember A, B, C, D, and F but I misty.Someone got hurt from a fistful of grass thrown at them with force. When they pressed charges, the cops charged the culprit with physical grass-ault.
What did the monochrome say to the rainbow?
Oh no! My arch nemesis!
I'm like a cow in tall grass,
I'm utterly tickled to be here.
What was the conversation like at the dinner party with all the boring flowers?
Like pollen teeth.
Have you heard about the banker who drowned in a river? It was a river of cash.
When the moisture from the sky stops falling
It really stops waning
What did the conifer say when he finally got alone with his crush? It’s just yew and me, baby.
I fernly beleaf my tree puns are qualitree, you can leaf me alone if you disagreen.
The fungi turned down seconds at dinner because he never had mushroom.
My dad used to say "the sky's the limit"
Which is probably why he got fired from his job at N.A.S.A.
Yesterday’s weather forecast predicted freezing rain. However, it turned out to be quite an ice day.
Why did the boy soon stop trying to grab the mountain fog? Because he always mist.
What did one hat say to the other on the hiking trip?
I'll wait here, you go on ahead.
Solving problems in the mountains is easy. It really Alps to clear your head.
How much do you love rainbows? Just a skittle bit.
What do you call a Grizzly at a nude beach?
Bear Naked.
There's snow place like the mountains in winter.
I stole fire from the gods.
But I couldn't fence it. It was too hot.
I once dreamt of crossing a wide river...
But it ended up being just a ferry tale.
Why are there fish at the bottom of the sea?
Because they dropped out of school.
I'm reading a book called "The Yellow River"
It's written by I.P. Freely