How do you cut an ocean in half?
With a seasaw!
It was so hot that the bee's perm had become extremely unmanageable, so she turned into a frizzbee.
What do you call a funnel shaped storm made of ketchup?
A tormato.
What’s an ig?
A snow house without a loo!
What did the sarcastic otter say?
I think you’ve confused me with someone who builds a dam.
Green vegetables absolutely love going on camps as a group. Their favorite is the Brussels Scouts.
Why does the river never get lost?
She always finds the right pathwave.
What did the thunderstorm say to the lightning rod?
You'll never catch me, copper!
What types of stories do giant sequoias love to tell? Tall tales, of course.
How do geologists like to relax?
In rocking chairs, of course!
What did the beaver say after she slipped in water?
Dam it.
My grandpa used to cut the grass before he died
but he has been lawn gone.
Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water?
Because he was a little horse!
I don’t know if I got hit by freezing rain but it sure hurt like hail.
Seas the day.
There are more planes in the ocean than there are submarines in the sky
This much is plane to sea
Q: What did the cloud say to the lightning bolt?
A: You're shocking!
What did the flower say when her son went off to college?
I be-leaf in you.
Why don’t clams give to charity?
Because they’re shellfish!
What is fog's favorite drink? Mountain Dew
How can you tell that the ocean is friendly? It waves!
What is batman’s favorite food (ans Just-ice)
Not much, just-ice.
What do you say to a flower after a breakup?
Get clover it.
My wife asked me, “Did you fog up the bathroom mirror again?”
I said, “I don’t see myself doing that.”
How many lips does a flower have?
Tulips.
Did you hear about one flower who went on a date with another flower?
It’s a budding romance.
What does a flower say when they’re offering you a job?
Take it or leaf it.
Did you hear about the flower who was struck in a hit and run?
She was leafed for dead.
What's a king's favorite kind of precipitation?
Hail!
What do you call it when it's raining and the sun is shining but a rainbow doesn't come out? A refrainbow.
Today isn’t the day to be making jokes about the weather.
It’s snow joke.
My boss has just fired me for making too many Asian jokes.
Oh well!! That's the end of my Korea.
A guy just walked into my store and bought a bunch of fog machines so I called the cops.
He must belong to an extreme mist organization.
Last night the river was arrested. The river was accused of illegal streaming.
It's ok to be negative if you find yourself in a thunderstorm.
You probably won't get struck by lightning.
My friend asked me how big the ocean is.
I said "can you be more Pacific?"
HIJKLMNO is the formula for water
H to O.
What does the birch like to study in school? Chemistree.
Q: What do you call it when it rains chickens and ducks?
A: Fowl weather.
Are you addicted to the ocean and ocean life?
If you are, sea kelp
The reason lakes are bigger than rivers is because one has running water whereas the other water is merely standing.
How much do you love rainbows? Just a skittle bit.
During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
There’s two balloons in the desert. One says look out for that cactus!
The other goes What Cactussssss...
What did you call an awesome geologist? A rockstar!
I was so disappointed when I went to the court house themed restaurant and all they gave me was frozen water.
Justice was served.
I was surprised when I saw a man get struck by lightning.
The man was shocked as well.
Want to hear a joke about weather?
Actually, never mind. I'll just save it for a rainy day.
The cloud hailed from the sky kingdom.
What did the tree tell the drill? You bore me.
My friend has just won the tallest Christmas tree competition
I thought to myself, 'How can you top that?
There are two reasons why you should never drink toilet water.
Number one. And number two.