"That was a howling adventure!" said the werewolf to the zombie.
What do you call a zombie who stir-fries?
Dead Man Wokking
What time do zombies wake up?
At ate o’clock!
Did you hear about the vampire who only had one fang?
He just had to grin and bare it.
In the night, a visitor came past my igloo. It was a yeti!
Not sure who left the other cooler, but thanks!
What is the difference between a deer running away and a small witch?
One is a hunted stag and one is a stunted hag!
How did the witch feel about using her broom to do housework?
She bristled at the suggestion!
Who's Denmark's greatest Zombie actor?
Rigor Mortissen
What happened when the ice monster had a furious row with Frankenstein?
He gave him the cold shoulder!
What did one sea monster say to the other sea monster when they started their new jobs as sewer inspectors?
- It’s going to be a Nessie job, but let’s get Kraken!
What do you learn in witch school?
Spelling.
What did the broken hearted skeleton say?
After all to-marrow is another day.
How did the skeleton baker make bread?
He Knee-d it.
What is an ogre's favorite snack?
Y-ogre-t.
Where are werewolf movies made?
Howl-lywood.
What do you call a goblin brigand?
A robgoblin.
What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler.
What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning?
Great! A jolt to the bolt!
What is the highest compliment a zombie can receive?
- Wow, you're in Grave condition!
What kind of hat does a skeleton wear at Easter?
A Bone-et.
What do you call it when witches are optimistic about the future?
Witchful thinking.
What cheese do vampires eat?
Munster.
Why did the skeletons stay out of the forest?
Because sticks and stones will break their bones.
A giant fly has attacked the local police...
Police have called the SWAT team.
Who will Frankenstein’s monster take to the dance?
Any old girl he can dig up.
What did the zombie get when she was late to dinner?
The cold shoulder.
How do you get rid of a witch’s hex?
Draw a hex-a-gone.
What is it called when a skeleton lawyer works for free!
Pro Bone-O.
What do you get when you cross a werewolf and a vampire?
A fur coat that fangs around your neck.
What did one angry werewolf say to the other?
- I have a bone to pick with you!
The skeleton couldn't keep anything tidy because of his lazy bones.
Vampires are too easy to play jokes on. Suckers.
Why was Frankenstein’s monster always being arrested?
He was so easy to charge.
Did you see that movie about King Kong, the giant ape?
The plot was pretty bananas.
How did the witch invite the wizard to take an evening ride on her broomstick?
Voodoo like to ride with me?
What's a ghost's favorite makeup to wear? Mas-scare-a!
How do ghouls like their meals?
Runny!
What did the angry witch do after sitting on her broomstick?
She flew off the handle.
Tne thing you won't catch a vampire ordering in a restaurant is a stake sandwich.
What is a baby sasquatch's favorite toy?
His Yeti Bear!
Why can’t skeletons play church music?
Because they have no organs.
Zombies are dead but they live with it.
How does a werewolf make bechamel sauce?
They start with a rooooooooouuuuuuuux.
What streets do zombies live on?
Dead ends.
Where do Yetis go to dance?
To a snow ball.
What do vampires do when they are trying to fall asleep?
Count Draculas.
What did the ghost do at the red light? He came to a dead stop.
What did one witch's cat say to the other?
You look familiar.
What do you call witches who live together?
Broom-mates.
There is a Giant Screwdriver attacking the city. Please seek shelter immediately. This is not a drill.