What’s a vampire’s favorite type of dog?
A blood hound.
Vampires are too easy to play jokes on. Suckers.
“Watch out! The road curves ahead” cried the skeleton.
“It’s spine“ replied the driver.
Did you hear about the zombie after-school club?
It's dead in that place.
A ghost's favourite pie flavour is boo-berry.
If you're wondering if someone's become a vampire, there's an easy way to tell. A true vampire is always coffin.
What do hydras fear the most?
Dehydration!
What is the fear of giants called?
Fee-fi-phobia
Did you hear about the comedian who entertained at a werewolves’ party?
He had them howling all night.
What kind of dog did Frankenstein want for Christmas?
A lab.
Bigfoot saw me today
I bet nobody believes him.
Why wouldn’t the ghost eat liver? He didn’t have the stomach for it.
I’ve started dating Medusa recently.
Our relationship rocks!
A witch with chickenpox is called an itchy-witchy.
What time does the Wicked Witch have her clocks set to?
Greenwitch Mean Time.
What did mother werewolf say to the naughty boy werewolf?
- We're werewolves, not swear-wolves.
Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
No body.
What do you get when you cross a werewolf and a hyena?
A monster with a sense of humor.
Please stop making jokes about little people
How would you feel if a bunch of giants made jokes about you?
What do you call a communist vampire?
A red blood count.
What do werewolf like for breakfast?
Pooched eggs.
What kind of pet fish did the skeleton have?
A bonefish.
What time do werewolf Cowboys have a shootout?
High Moon!
Ghosts are terrible liars because you can see right through them.
Big Foot has been spotted throwing tantrums and talking back to his parents.
No wonder they call him the Sassquatch.
What do zombies eat for dessert?
Eyes cream.
What kind of birds do skeletons like?
Sea skulls.
Judging by the sounds, there’s an ogre staying in the hotel room above me.
Hopefully he shreks out tomorrow.
Where do zombies go for beach holidays?
The Dead Sea.
Witches are always wand-ering around…
Why did the mommy and daddy werewolves call their son “Camera”?
Because he was always snapping at things!
What do you call a herd of undead llamas?
The zombie alpacalypse.
What's a ghost with a broken leg called? A hoblin goblin.
How is Big Foot so good at rock climbing?
He always finds the biggest footholds.
Where do Ghosts travel to for a holiday? South Aarghfricaargh.
What do you get if you cross a pumpkin with a bigfoot?
A Sasquash.
Why did the zombie stop teaching?
He only had one pupil!
What do you get if you cross a werewolf and a pet dog?
A terrified postman.
Witches always fly on broomsticks because they want to make a clean getaway.
Did you know that ghosts call their true love their ghoul-friend?
Where do ghosts go trick or treating? Dead ends.
What goes ‘Cackle, cackle, cackle, bonk’?
A witch laughing her head off.
How do you greet a five-headed ghoul?
Hello, hello, hello, hello, hello!
I just found out my Husband is a Ghost. I realised the moment he walked through the door.
When the ghost went to a fancy restaurant, he decided to wear a boo-tie.
What was the skeleton doing at the hockey game?
Driving the zam-boney.
Why do werewolves do well at school?
Because every time they’re asked a question, they come up with a snappy answer!
Why was the ghoul so smart?
He always ate brain food!
The skeleton ordered a cabernet wine with a full body because he didn't have one.
What kind of vehicle does Bigfoot drive?
A big toe-truck.