What do you call a troll that’s in charge?
In control.
What time do werewolf Cowboys have a shootout?
High Moon!
Why are ghouls so healthy?
They always eat fresh food!
Where do zombie monkeys live?
In the brain forest.
How do you kill a troll?
Take away its internet access.
- Dad, where are the DVDs? Where's Shrek, I want to watch it.
- Somewhere ogre there.
At the Italian restaurant, the ghoul ordered spook-ghetti for his main course.
What do you call a lineup of food with lots of garlicky dishes?
Buffet the Vampire Slayer!
What do zombies say to their sweethearts?
- I chew-s you.
Where do werewolf go if their tails fall off?
A re-tail store.
Someone who does not become a witch until they're old is a late broomer.
Halloween was nearly over, and the zombie was hurrying to get back to her tomb before the sun came up.
She was rushing so much, she didn't even notice the headstone was the wrong shape before she got in. It was a grave mistake.
Why didn’t the skeleton play football?
His heart wasn’t in it.
What did the witch get her cat for entertainment?
A cat-alog.
Did you hear about the werewolf who got invited to the dance?
He really wanted to go, but the upcoming full moon was giving him paws.
Why don’t werewolf make good dancers?
Because they have two left feet!
What do ghouls drink?
Boos!
Why did people stop going to the ghoul hospital?
They kept coming out dead!
What is a vampire’s favorite sport?
Casketball.
What is the difference between a deer running away and a small witch?
One is a hunted stag and one is a stunted hag!
Why was the book of incantations useless?
Because the author failed to do a spell-check.
I heard Medusa looked really pretty.
In fact, her looks were stunning.
What kind of dishes do skeletons serve tea on?
Bone china.
What do you call the ghost of a door-to-door salesman? A dead ringer.
What’s a zombie’s favorite toy?
A dead-y bear.
What happened when the zombie refused to pay its ticket from the police?
It was facing grave consequences.
What’s a vampire's favorite fruit?
A neck-tarine.
What do you call a skeleton who hangs out in coffee shops and listens to indie music?
A hip-ster.
Why is Frankenstein such good fun?
Because he soon has you in stitches.
Why don’t people like grumpy vampires?
Because they have bat tempers.
What did the skeleton say when he went riding on his motorcycle?
- I’m bone to be wild!
People say Frankenstein’s monster had a temper…
But actually he was surprisingly level-headed.
What problem do you encounter with twin witches?
You can never tell which is witch.
Where do fashionable ghosts shop for sheets? Bootiques.
What do you call a skeleton with no friends?
Bonely.
What is a witch's favorite makeup?
A ma-scare-a.
Who is the most famous skeleton detective?
Sherlock Bones.
The zombie worked for years to win this prize. He showed real dead-ication.
Never believe minotaurs...
Half of everything they say is bull.
What time do zombies wake up?
At ate o’clock!
What kind of chocolate do ghouls like?
Hearse-sheys!
Why do werewolves do well at school?
Because every time they’re asked a question, they come up with a snappy answer!
It's easier to prepare meals with this new cookware-wolf.
There's a group of girls that love vampires at my school. I really want to join their fang club.
Where is the ghost going on holiday the next year? Lake Eerie.
Why did the skeleton go to the hospital?
To have his ghoul bladder removed.
People keep asking me why I’m working for Dr. Frankenstein.
I’m just trying to make a living.
Why was the werewolf arrested at the butchers shop?
He was caught chop lifting.
Why didn’t the skeleton rob the bank?
Because he didn’t have the guts.
What do you get when you cross a werewolf and a person who makes pots?
Harry Potter