Why is Frankenstein always asking for help?
He’s looking for someone to give him a hand.
What do you call a clever monster?
Frank Einstein.
What do you call the Frankenstein of the Gardening world?
An A-botan-ation.
I love making new friends.
That’s why I studied under Dr. Frankenstein.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
Dr. Frankenstein must have been pretty buff.
He was a bodybuilder, after all.
What happened when the ice monster had a furious row with Frankenstein?
He gave him the cold shoulder!
People keep asking me why I’m working for Dr. Frankenstein.
I’m just trying to make a living.
Sad to hear that Baron von Frankenstein has given up on his dream of being an actor.
He couldn’t get the parts.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster give up boxing?
Because he didn’t want to spoil his looks.
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
Which musical group did Frankenstein not like at all?
The Village People.
How did Dr. Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster?
On a piece rate.
Was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride?
Yes, he simply couldn’t resistor.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
How does Frankenstein speak?
Frankly.
Who brings the monsters their babies?
Frankenstork.
What should you do when you see Frankenstein walking towards you?
Make a bolt for it.
Why didn’t Dr. Frankenstein ever make a second monster?
Because he just didn’t have the guts to do it again.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
Why is Frankenstein such good fun?
Because he soon has you in stitches.
Frankenstein's monster and the bride of Frankenstein sit down for dinner
Bride: How come you never help with the dinner
Frankenstein: I did
Bride: How?
Frankenstein: I did the mash...
Bride: Don't you dare
Why did Frankenstein turn to solar?
For the free charge.
How does Frankenstein eat his dinner?
He bolts it down.
What did one of Frankenstein’s ears say to the other?
I didn’t know we lived on the same block.
What monster plays the most April Fool’s jokes?
Prankenstein!
Where does a thrifty Frankenstein get his limbs?
At the second-hand store.
How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
What happened when Dr. Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
He got atomic ache.
What kind of dog did Frankenstein want for Christmas?
A lab.
What did Dr.Frankenstein say when his monster spat on him?
It’s saliva!
People say Frankenstein’s monster had a temper…
But actually he was surprisingly level-headed.
What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
IT’S A LIEEEEE!!
Who will Frankenstein’s monster take to the dance?
Any old girl he can dig up.
Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
Why doesn’t Frankenstein go on airplanes?
He can’t get past the airport metal detector.
What tree monster prowls the forest?
Frankenpine.
Dr. Frankenstein: Igor, have you seen my latest invention? It’s a new pill consisting of 50 percent glue and 50 percent aspirin.
Igor: But what is it for?
Dr. Frankenstein: For monsters with splitting headaches.
Why is Frankenstein’s monster so popular?
He’s a real people person.
Dr. Frankenstein just placed an order on Amazon.
It wasn't expensive, but I imagine the shipping cost him an arm and a leg.
What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster?
HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.
What do you call it when Dr. Frankenstein makes tea?
A monstrositea.
How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning?
Great! A jolt to the bolt!
Frankenstein entered a body-building competition…
And soon found he had seriously misunderstood the objective.
What’s the best time for Frankenstein to go to a party?
Fright now.
Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
His ghoul friend.