Working

Your mind is on vacation but your mouth is working overtime.
A hydrogen molecule gets arrested.
His mother comes down to the police station to bail him out. She is met by the detective working the case.
I don’t understand it, says the mother. Hydrogen was always a good kid. I never had any problems til he met oxygen.
Don’t worry, says the detective. The situation is fluid but he won’t be charged.
It may seem a bit corny but we appreciate you working your tail off for us.
What do you call security guards working outside Samsung shops? Guardians of the Galaxy.
Why do people like working at the Red Lobster?
It helps them get out of their shell.
Girlfriend was working on the motorcycle with me the other day...
She exclaimed "God! This is ridiculous. I need, like, four arms to do this!".

To which I replied "but honey, you DO have forearms!"
I got fired from the bomb disposal squad
Too bad, I had a blast working there.
Some marine biologists argued about how best to handle angry dolphins.
The were working at cross porpoises.
A blond calls her mom...
Blond: "Mom mom!! I'm a genius!"
Mother: "Really dear? How's that possible?"
Blond: "I finished a puzzle that I've been working on for 1 year and on the box it said 'for 2-5 yrs'."
I've recently got a job making chess pieces.
I'm mostly working knights.
Working the poker table at the casino with my new prosthetic hand is going to be a challenge,
But I’ll learn to deal with it.
Working as a dock hand is hard,
but it's wharf it.
A blond calls her mom...
Blond: "Mom mom!! I'm a genius!"
Mother: "Really dear? How's that possible?"
Blond: "I finished a puzzle that I've been working on for 1 year and on the box it said 'for 2-5 yrs'."
What do you call a metalhead working at Cold Stone? Alice Scooper.
What do you call a rapper working at Cold Stone? Scoop Dogg.