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Stops Jokes

Romantic Pick Up Lines
Your heart stops when you sneeze. Kind of like what happens when I think of you.
One Liners and Short Jokes
The human brain is a wonderful thing. It starts working the moment you are born, and never stops until you stand up to speak in public.
Cow Puns
What happens when a cow stops shaving?
It grows a Moostache.
Heart Puns
Scientist are shocked after discovery of a new african bee species that can keep on flying even after their heart stops.
Local tribes in fear of a zombee apocalypse
Cowboy Jokes
A cowboy is walking down main street in nothing but his boots and hat...
Shortly after he got into town, a sheriff stops him.

"Sir, why in the hell are you walkin down the street naked as a jaybird?"

"I can explain! See I met this girl named Sally. Well, I took her back to my place and she took her shirt off... So I took off mine. Then she took her pants off... And I took off mine. She whipped off her britches... And I slipped outta mine.

"After that she laid down and hollered, 'Go to town cowboy!'

"So here I am."
Fairy Puns
A man meets a fairy.
"I grant you 2 wishes" , says the fairy.
"I want a bottle of beer that never gets empty" , says the man.
He starts to drink. After two minutes he stops drinking and the bottle is still full.
"And youre second wish?" the fairy asks.
"Another one of those."
Physics Puns
A physics teacher is about to jump off a high bridge
When a friend stops him saying, "Don't do it, you have so much potential."
Sky Puns
When the moisture from the sky stops falling
It really stops waning
Peach Puns
The peach was late for work because it had to make some pit stops on the way.
Math Puns
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer. The second one orders half a beer. The third one orders a fourth of a beer. The bartender stops them, pours two beers and says, “You guys should know your limits.”
Funny Parenting Quotes
“Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the sidewalk before it stops snowing.”

- Phyllis Diller.
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