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Steve Jokes

Dad Jokes
This morning my son said to me, "Can I have a book mark?"
I burst into tears. Ten years old and he still doesn't know my name is Steve.
Funny Limericks
If a person would have several friends,
here's the thing upon which it depends;
are you willing to share
when there isn't much there
and burn up your day from both ends.

(By Steve Mckee)
Puns
McDonald’s fired CEO Steve Easterbrook has already got a new job at Old McDonalds farm.
He's their CIEIO.
Quotes
Crocodiles are easy. They try to kill and eat you.
People are harder. They pretend to be your friend first.
- Steve Irwin
Steve Martin
The last woman I was in was the Statue of Liberty.
Funny Parenting Quotes
“I’m totally ‘that dad’ who leaves a note in my son’s lunch box. One day I’ll actually start putting food in there also.”

- Steve Ryan.
Movie Pick Up Lines
"You know, it's dangerous for you to be here in the frozen foods section—because you could melt all this stuff."
- Steve Martin, My Blue Heaven (1990)
Funny Money Quotes
“I love money. I love everything about it. I bought some pretty good stuff. Got me a $300 pair of socks. Got a fur sink. An electric dog polisher. A gasoline powered turtleneck sweater. And, of course, I bought some dumb stuff, too.” – Steve Martin
Hockey Puns
Will the Red Wings be able to replace their venerable captain Steve? No, because
when it comes to hockey smarts there is no Yzer man.
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