Solid Jokes

Physics student asks to go to bathroom.
Professor asks "Liquid, Solid or Gas?"
Toilet jokes aren’t my favorite...
But they’re a solid number 2.
I bought some clear, liquid hand-soap today.
Got home and realized that I can't use it...
My hands are solid, and opaque.
King Hero of old Syracuse had doubts that made him frown.
"Perhaps my goldsmith did not use pure gold to make the crown."
Since proof of mischief must be strong to put a thief in collar,
The king who feared his judgment wrong called on his science scholar.
"Archimedes, friend of old, find me the solution!
Is my crown pure solid gold, or is that an illusion?"
The scholar's task was serious; he struggled hard with math.
His mind was near delirious until he poured his bath.
He noticed how the water pushed him up as he stepped in.
He thought about it harder as he stroked his bearded chin.
"The weight of displaced liquid should always let me know
When any golden solid has a density too low!"
"Eureka!", he resounded. "I have such a clever mind".
Yet his claim was unfounded 'cause he left his clothes behind!

(by Robert Z)
What did the anciient Roman soldier tell his girlfriend?
You are a solid X
Guess my spotify is broken. I saw you on the top 10 of this month, but you're clearly a solid 11.
“Friendship must be built on a solid foundation of alcohol, sarcasm, inappropriateness and shenanigans.”
— Unknown
“To like and dislike the same things, that is what makes a solid friendship.”
— Sallust
What do you call solid gold bananas? A bunch of money.
So, if I heat my solid state hard drive until it becomes a gaseous state hard drive
Would that mean I'm doing cloud computing?
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