Soft Jokes

Hello, eh. Girl your soft brown eyes remind me of the amazing beaver, eh.
What should you name a crow with soft down feathers? Microwsoft.
Why is Pavlov's hair so soft?
Because he conditions it.
I got hit in the head with a can of soda yesterday. Luckily for me, it was a soft drink.
In Italy there is a group pf moms creating soft cheese...
They brand themselves as MOMzarella.
" Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays." — Henny Youngman
People who use sleeping bags in the woods are soft tacos for bears.
Can I give you a hug to show you how soft my sweater is?
They say this stuff makes clothes really soft. Want to come over and have a feel?
Soft fruits make really supportive parents. Whenever their youngsters fail at something, they just smile and say “Have another bite at the cherry.”
Soft fruit is not always the best at doing research. They aren’t very thorough; they tend to cherry pick information.
I recently went to a soft fruit party, where all the food was berry based. It was cherrific.
Cherries are the worst soft fruits to watch scary movies with. They spend the whole time hiding behind a cushion as they are cherrified.
I spent last Christmas with a bunch of soft fruit. I kept getting confused with the toast – they were saying “Eat, drink and be cherry!”
I hit my head on a light bulb today, but it’s okay.
It was a soft white.
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