Raising Jokes

Why do short people have a hard time raising a family? Because they struggle to put food on the table.
How does the man help clean the house? Raising the feet, for the woman to pass the vacuum cleaner on the carpet.
“Before I got married, I had six theories about raising children; now I have six children and no theories.”—John Wilmot
Why did the guy decide not to donate a dime to any charity raising funds for a marathon?
Because they just take the money and run.
Why are cowboys prone to gambling?
Because they're always raising the steaks.
This year for Valentine's day I got my wife the ace of hearts and packets of corn flour, rice flour and self raising flour
She wasn't happy. Apparently it wasn't what she meant when she said she just wanted a card and flowers.
This Valentine's day, I decided to pay extra and buy flowers that look after themselves.
They are Self Raising.
Good work, we’re raising your annual celery
This year for Valentine's day I got my wife the ace of hearts and packets of corn flour, rice flour and self raising flour
She wasn't happy. Apparently it wasn't what she meant when she said she just wanted a card and flowers.
Why are cowboys prone to gambling?
Because they're always raising the steaks.
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