"Men do not quit playing because they grow old—they grow old because they quit playing." - Oliver Wendell Holmes
What game do fawns like playing at sleepovers?
My wife got mad at me for playing catch with my son in the backyard
... I didn’t see the big deal until I dropped him.
Why was the pig given a red card at the football game?
For playing dirty.
You're such a treat that I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me.
Two flies are playing football on a saucer.
They’re practicing for the cup.
“You dropped your kid off a changing table? Stuff just happens, okay? Last week, my kid ate a cigarette. I caught him playing in the dryer yesterday. I picked up the wrong baby from daycare. I found my baby swimming in the toilet. No judging.”

- 'What To Expect When You Are Expecting'.
"Show me a man who is a good loser and I’ll show you a man who is playing golf with his boss."
~ Jim Murray
Did you hear that? They're playing our future song on the speakers!
One of my kitchen utensils seems to be playing classical music.
Think it’s the Chopin board.
What did the kid nut say to the other when playing tag? “I’m going to cashew”.
Which nut is the best at playing tag?
Catch-yous aka cashews.
A team of mushrooms was playing basketball against a team of cabbages. The mushrooms won. Everyone cheered for the champignons.
I was at a bar and heard a band playing a Queen cover. I asked them what the name of their band was. They are called the Champignons my friend.
Shaun was playing beach soccer when a couple of tourists made fun of his tall height. I replied, "Can you repeat that again? I couldn't see you behind this tiny grain of sand".
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