Playing Jokes

What game do fawns like playing at sleepovers?
"Show me a man who is a good loser and I’ll show you a man who is playing golf with his boss."
~ Jim Murray
One of my kitchen utensils seems to be playing classical music.
Think it’s the Chopin board.
What did the kid nut say to the other when playing tag? “I’m going to cashew”.
Which nut is the best at playing tag?
Catch-yous aka cashews.
"Men do not quit playing because they grow old—they grow old because they quit playing." - Oliver Wendell Holmes
Two flies are playing football on a saucer.
They’re practicing for the cup.
You're such a treat that I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me.
Did you hear that? They're playing our future song on the speakers!
A team of mushrooms was playing basketball against a team of cabbages. The mushrooms won. Everyone cheered for the champignons.
I was at a bar and heard a band playing a Queen cover. I asked them what the name of their band was. They are called the Champignons my friend.
Why was the pig given a red card at the football game?
For playing dirty.
Why do pigs make awful football players?
They don’t like playing with the “pig skin.”
My wife got mad at me for playing catch with my son in the backyard
... I didn’t see the big deal until I dropped him.
“You dropped your kid off a changing table? Stuff just happens, okay? Last week, my kid ate a cigarette. I caught him playing in the dryer yesterday. I picked up the wrong baby from daycare. I found my baby swimming in the toilet. No judging.”

- 'What To Expect When You Are Expecting'.
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