Pillow Jokes

The ham's on your pillow,
The egg's in your sheet,
The bran muffin's rollin'
Down under your feet,
There's milk in the mattress,
And juice on the spread -
Well, you said that you wanted
Your breakfast in bed.

(Shel Silverstein)
I can be your travel pillow.
You are so small you could use a pillow as your bed and still have some wiggle room.
What's worse than seeing a spider run over your pillow?
Hearing it run over your pillow.
Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
What did the pillow say when the blanket asked it to come hang out?
I'm down
Have you heard about these new corduroy pillow cases?
They're really making headlines.
What pillow set do the church organist and his wife have?
Hymn and Hers.
Remind me not to get into another pillow fight... the risk for a concushion is too big.
I was going to buy a new pillow....
but I decided I better sleep on it first
Who puts money under a deer’s pillow when they lose a tooth?
The hoof fairy.
What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name? You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.
I left my phone under my pillow last night and woke up to coins underneath it. It must have been the Blue-tooth fairy.
What do you call it when a pillow hits its head?
A concushion.
I expected a call last night, so I slept with my phone under my pillow.
When I woke up it was gone, and there was a dollar coin in its place?!
Must have been the Bluetooth Fairy...
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