Pairs Jokes

What do you call an ant with five pairs of eyes?
Ant-ten-eye.
“In LA we get coyotes in our garbage cans. Coyotes are just like my relatives. They go out in pairs, they whine at night, and they go anywhere there’s food."
- Billy Crystal
Why do perfumes always hang out in pairs?
Because they don't want to get cologne-ly!
Shopping for Underwear A man walks up to the counter. "Two pairs of underwear please." The man behind the counter looks at him in disbelief. "Only two pairs of underwear?" "Yup. I wear one while the other is in the wash." The man behind the counter looks at him in disgust, then rings out his order. A second man walks in. "5 pairs of underwear please." "Only 5 eh?" "Yeah, I wear one for every weekday, then go commando all the weekend." The man behind the counter shakes his head. "Well, you're better then the last guy!" A third man walks in. "7 pairs of underwear please." "Finally, a man who knows hygiene!" "Yes, I do try. One for every day, and I do my laundry on Sunday." At the end of the day, a fourth man walks into the underwear store. "12 pairs of underwear please." "Wow! You must be really clean!" The man smiles. "Yup, that's me! Err, hang on, let me see if I counted right. January, February, March, April..."
Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants? In case they get a hole in one!
Is it hot in here or am I just wearing two pairs of long johns?
Why didn't the two worms go into Noah's ark in an apple? Because everyone had to go in pairs !
Why didn't the two worms get on Noah's Ark in an apple? Because everyone had to go on in pairs.
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