Opens Jokes

What type of key opens a banana?
A monkey.
My Grandad always said, “As one door closes, another one opens.”
Lovely man, terrible cabinet maker.
Albert Einstein, Blaise Pascal, and Isaac Newton decided to play a game of hide and seek.
Einstein covers his eyes and starts counting.
Pascal runs off to hide but Newton takes a chalk and marks a 1m×1m square on the floor and stands in it.
"Ready or not, here I come!" Einstein exclaims while he opens his eyes. He sees Newton standing out in the open and says "Haha, I found you Newton!"
Newton replies "No, you found Pascal."
What kind of a key opens a banana? A monkey!
I'm planning on making an application that randomly closes the video game you are playing and opens a different one.
It's going to be a game changer.
“When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.” —Prince Philip
On a recent flight, my friend asked me, "If the door suddenly opens, you think we will fall out?
I said, "No, we will still be friends."
What kind of key opens a banana? A monkey!
What kind of key opens the door on Thanksgiving? A turkey!
Stuck on what to get your Mum for Mother's Day?
Get her a fridge and watch her face light up as she opens it.
I just bought my friend a mini fridge for his birthday
I can’t wait to see his face light up when he opens it.
Einstein, Newton, and Pascal decide to play hide-and-seek. Einstein is "It," closes his eyes, counts to 10, and then opens them. Pascal is nowhere to be seen. Newton is sitting right in front of Einstein, with a piece of chalk in his hand. He's sitting in a box drawn on the ground, a meter to one side. Einstein says, "Newton, you're terrible, I've found you!" Newton says, "No no, no. You've found one Newton per square meter. You've found Pascal!"
When a man opens the car door for his wife, you can be sure of one thing, either the car is new or the wife is.
I just bought my friend a mini fridge for his birthday
I can’t wait to see his face light up when he opens it.
Just bought my wife a refrigerator, for our Anniversary:
Cannot wait to see her face light up when she opens it.
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