Opened

A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets.
As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her.
Without missing a beat, she said, 'Sir, I need to see your ticket, not your stub.'
Just opened my water bill and my electricity bill at the same time… I was shocked.”
Have you heard about the latest restaurant that opened up on moon?
No, how is that restaurant?
There was a Young Lady whose eyes,
Were unique as to colour and size;
When she opened them wide,
People all turned aside,
And started away in surprise.
There was a Young Lady whose eyes,
Were unique as to colour and size;
When she opened them wide,
People all turned aside,
And started away in surprise.
A cowboy emigrated to Wales
and opened a ranch at Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch.
Unfortunately, none of his cattle survived the branding.
Did you hear about the birds of prey who opened up a resort?
It was for owl seasons.
What did the man with no hands get for his christmas gift?
Gloves.

Just Joking. He still hasn't opened the gift.
Did you hear about the guy who opened up a store where they only sell Swiss cheese?
It’s a hole business strategy.
An Iranian entrepreneur opened a copy shop.
It's called *Prints of Persia*.
What did the mayonnaise say when somebody opened the refrigerator? “Hey, close the door! I’m dressing!”
I always thought that being woke up in the morning by a blowjob must be great
Until i slept on the bench in the park with my mouth opened.