Monster

Everyone knows Albert Einstein because of his research in physics. But most people don’t know about his brother who did research in monster making...
His name was Frank.
"What did Frankenstein's monster say to his girlfriend?"

"Will you be my Valenstein?"
Dracula decided it was time to give his son "the talk"

Dracula: "You see, when two monsters love each other very much, they-"

Son: "They do the mash."

Dracula: *nodding* "They do the monster mash."
What do you call a fashionable, but judgmental monster who howls at the moon?
A What Not To Wear-Wolf.
How can you tell the difference between a monster and a banana? Try picking it up. If you can't, it's either a monster or a giant banana.
Why don't potatoes go to parties?
They're scared of the Monster Mash.
What do you get if cross a baseball player and a monster?
A double header.
Did you hear about the monster with five legs? His trousers fit him like a glove.
What did the monster say when he saw a rush hour train full of passengers? Oh good! A chew chew train!
Why did the monster eat the caboose? The locomotive told it to choo choo.
Why did the cookie monster rob the keebler elves? Because they had a lot of dough.
The only type of cookies a cookie monster loves to eat during Halloween is Ghoul Scout Cookies.
Why does the cookie monster fear the gingerbread man? Because he’s one tough cookie.
The cookie monster couldn’t make his bed, why? Because he couldn’t find his cookie sheets.