Maintenance

Sometimes planes go in for maintenance when they have cracks in their bodywork, we call them air-line fractures.
Why don’t giraffes make good pets?
They’re too high maintenance.
Why are there so many ruts in the ice at the rink?
The maintenance crew must be slipping up.
I'm a maintenance engineer and I'd love to tinker with your parts.
My computer has a language
That is foreign to me
It speaks of RAM and Gigabytes
And what could ROM be!
I don’t understand the Windows
My computer says are there
Nor the Gem Clip at the side of my page
Wth eyes that blink and stare!
I don’t unerstand the cures
That maintenance wizards do
It’s called defragmenter, span disk,
And virus cleaning too!
Yet, computer and I work hand and eye
With a mouse to translate
The tasks that I want it to do
While it points out my mistakes!
(Burmah M. Teague)
The female janitor at my office asked me if I would like to smoke some weed with her.
I said no. I can't deal with high maintenance women.
The Problem With the Light Switch
The Problem With the Light Switch Recently I was having trouble with my light switch so I called for the maintenance guy. An old grizzled Chinese man arrived shortly after and inspected the switch. He stated that the light switch was working perfectly fine but noted that indeed it was not working as I had said. "This is not a job for just one person. You need more people to help you." He said, so I got my wife to help. Still no good. "More people" he said as he saw it still not working. So at that point, I got my son and daughter to help as well but still no luck "Many more." He said. Luckily the neighbors were home and after a quick discussion with them I had the whole clan from next door over to help. In total there were now 11 people, plus the maintenance man in the lounge. At this point the maintenance man tells me to get everyone to touch the switch and to try it again and sure enough, it worked. I was flabbergasted and asked how and why this had worked now where it wouldn't before with just myself He replied "Many hands make light work."
Want to start your day laughing? Register to our Daily Joke!
By continuing, you agree to our T&C and Privacy Policy