Keyboard

What do you call a solar powered keyboard?
A photosynthesiser
Which keyboard shortcut doesn't work if you're incontinent?
Ctrl-P
What's the sketchiest button combo on a computer keyboard?
Shift + T
I was dating a keyboard but we had to break up...
...she just wasn't my type.
I wasn't making enough money as a keyboard percussionist so I started moonlighting as gun salesperson.
I go from glockenspiel to Glock and spiel.
I left my job at the keyboard factory today. To be honest, I had been looking for an Escape for a while.
What do you do if you spill maple syrup all over your keyboard?
Just turn off sticky keys.
IF YOU GUYS SEE A LINK ON FACEBOOK THAT SAYS "GET A MILLION DOLLARS FOR FREE" DON'T CLICK ON IT.
IT IS A VIRUS THAT PUTS YOUR PHONE'S KEYBOARD ON CAPS LOCK.
Got fired from my job at the keyboard factory. I couldn't keep the space clean.
Why did Karen press Ctrl-Shift-Esc on her keyboard?
Because she wanted to speak to the Task Manager!
V
V

Edit*: sorry it seems as the CTRL button on my keyboard isn't working
A good workman doesn't blame his fools
\*tools.
Stupid keyboard.
I took all the punctuation marks off of the judge's keyboard.
I expect a long sentence.
I asked the librarian for the new book on erectile dysfunction.
She typed on her keyboard and said "It's not coming up!"
I said "Yeah, that's the one!!"
“My keyboard must be broken, I keep hitting the escape key, but I’m still at work.” — Author Unknown
A Human Loving Alien
A Human Loving Alien An astronaut is the first to step onto an alien planet. The alien's are so excited that they change all their signs to English, and even rename some of their places and landmarks after Human places and landmarks and things. The astronaut decides the first place he wants to go is a pub. He sees a nearby alien and asks, "where's the pub?" The alien gurgles back but his suit translates to the astronaut in real time. The alien says, "just around the corner!" The astronaut heads around the corner and sees it! It's labelled "The Keyboard" and he asks the bouncer, "Why is it called the Keyboard?" The bouncer replies, "the boss loves all things human and changed his name to reflect that. Ask him, he's the bartender." So the astronaut enters the Keyboard and goes to the bartender. "Excuse me, do you own this pub?" The astronaut says. "I do." The bartender gurgles back. "Why is it called the Keyboard?" The man asks. "Well," the alien gurgles in reply, "since I knew you humans were coming I updated the name!" The astronaut is on the edge of his seat... "The reason it's called the Keyboard is because it's a space bar."
Want to start your day laughing? Register to our Daily Joke!
By continuing, you agree to our T&C and Privacy Policy