Has Jokes

I’ve always thought that heck is the only thing hotter than the sun but that has all changed today.
Has anyone ever told you that you look like an ancient Chinese scroll? Because I can't stop looking you up and down.
Are you a florist? Cause ever since I met you, my life has been Rosey.
Your shirt has to go, but you can stay.
“Diet day #1: All the unhealthy food has been removed from the house. It was delicious.”
― Unknown
“Anyone who says that money cannot buy happiness has clearly never spent their money on pizza.”
― Andrew W.K.
Did you know this mall has a movie theater? I just saw a preview of our life together. Looks pretty good!
You are the reason Santa even has a naughty list.
I'll love you until Tom catches Jerry and has him for supper.
"Do you have a cell phone I could use?"
"Why?"
"Someone has to call God and tell him that one of his angels is missing."
- Couples Retreat (2009)
“I gotta warn ya, every man I’ve ever gone out with has been ruined.”
“Well, that’s what they get for messing with my girl.”
- Bugsy (1991)
"Either he's dead or my watch has stopped."
"Why should I do anything for posterity? What has posterity ever done for me?"
"Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does."
You know, your smile has been lighting up the room all night, and I just had to come and say hello.
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