Harder Jokes

ā€œI think Smithers picked me because of my motivational skills. Everyone says they have to work a lot harder when Iā€™m around.ā€ ā€” Homer Simpson
I quit my job at the concrete plant.
My job was getting harder & harder.
A tutor who taught on the flute,
tried to teach two young tooters to toot.
Said the two to the tutor,
"Is it harder to toot or,
to tutor two tooters to toot?"
Crocodiles are easy. They try to kill and eat you.
People are harder. They pretend to be your friend first.
- Steve Irwin
Why is it harder for Orange Juice to slide across a floor than apple juice?
Pulp Friction.
Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?
Because of you, I laugh a little harder, cry a little less, and smile a lot more.
King Hero of old Syracuse had doubts that made him frown.
"Perhaps my goldsmith did not use pure gold to make the crown."
Since proof of mischief must be strong to put a thief in collar,
The king who feared his judgment wrong called on his science scholar.
"Archimedes, friend of old, find me the solution!
Is my crown pure solid gold, or is that an illusion?"
The scholar's task was serious; he struggled hard with math.
His mind was near delirious until he poured his bath.
He noticed how the water pushed him up as he stepped in.
He thought about it harder as he stroked his bearded chin.
"The weight of displaced liquid should always let me know
When any golden solid has a density too low!"
"Eureka!", he resounded. "I have such a clever mind".
Yet his claim was unfounded 'cause he left his clothes behind!

(by Robert Z)
Hey I am like a Rubik's cube the more you play with me the harder I get!
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