What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.
What does a loaf of bread say when breaking up with his girlfriend?
You deserve butter.
What is a dairy product like as a partner?
They’re your butter half.
A toast to you:
You always know how to make everything butter.
Plain popcorn? You can do butter than that.
What's the difference between butter and the corona virus?
Corona actually spreads.
What is a Leatherback Sea Turtles favorite sandwich?
Peanut butter and jellyfish.
There was an Old Man of Calcutta,
Who perpetually ate bread and butter,
Till a great bit of muffin,
On which he was stuffing,
Choked that horrid Old Man of Calcutta.
There was an Old Person of Prague,
Who was suddenly seized with the Plague;
But they gave his some butter,
Which caused him to mutter,
And cured that Old Person of Prague.
You should call us butter because we are on a roll. This would be one of the best volleyball puns to put on a T-shirt.
What’s the definition of butter?
An angry goat.
I won’t let you slip through my Butter Fingers.
“Man cannot live by bread alone; he must have peanut butter.”
James A. Garfield
“I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn’t a professional, the knife had butter on it.”
Rodney Dangerfield
What did the oreo cookie say to his filling? You’re my butter half.