About

Did you hear about the pear that fell off of the tree and fell to its death?
The damage was irreparable.
Did you hear about the man who sat next to his clone on the train?
He was beside himself.
Did you hear about the train that dressed up for Halloween?
It became a fright train.
I tried to tell my favourite joke about trains, but it got derailed.
Did you hear about the boy who had to do a project on trains? He had to keep track of everything!
My wife just yells from upstairs and asks "Do you ever get a shooting pain across your body, like someone's got a voodoo doll of you and they're stabbing it?"

Sounding concerned, I reply, "No..."

A few seconds of silence, and then she shouts: "How about now?"
My girlfriend keeps saying that a small dick is nothing to worry about.
I still wish she hadn't got one.
What do you get if you cross Islam and Capitalism?
No more jokes about the profit.
My wife: Did you know a single dolphin can have more than 200 offspring?
Me: Wow How about the married ones?
Some marine biologists argued about how best to handle angry dolphins.
The were working at cross porpoises.
Did you hear about the boat that crashed into the beach?
The captain fell asleep and the crew didn't realize until they were already in the no wake zone.
My sister said I would never be able to make a beach pun.
Is seashore about that?
Did you hear about the crow who worked at a call Center?
He was fired for Just Caws.
What was the snail doing on the highway? About one mile a day!
My friend was telling me about how a shark attacked her while she was diving
I told her, that bites.