If Smart water were actually smart…
Then why did it get bottled?
What did the egg say to the boiling water?
I might have some trouble getting hard, I just got laid this morning!
Why was the man using ketchup during the rain?
Someone said it was raining cats and hot dogs.
Which weighs less; butane, gasoline or water?
Butane, because it's lighter fluid.
My friend couldn't afford to pay his water bill.
So I sent him a “get well soon” card.
Did you ever hear the joke about the three holes in the ground?
Well, well, well.
What do you call water that is good for you?
Well water.
Why does the river never get lost?
She always finds the right pathwave.
Why is the ocean always on time?
She likes to stay current.
RIP to Boiled Water.
You will be sorely mist.
Why does the river have problems remembering things?
Because she is becoming sea nile.
Where do meteorologists like to drink after work?
The closest ISOBAR.
Where do water droplets go to settle arguments?
The Supreme Quart.
Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water?
Because he was a little horse!
Why do poets always write about the sea?
They just can’t fathom her depths.
How did the raindrop ask another raindrop on a date?
He asked her “Water you doing tonight?”
Why are oceans so meticulous?
They like to be pacific.
There are two reasons why you should never drink toilet water.
Number one. And number two.
What do you call two days of rain in a row in Seattle?
The weekend.