Wanna know what I said when I got hit by a water gun?
H2Oww
HIJKLMNO is the formula for water
H to O.
RIP to Boiled Water.
You will be sorely mist.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a water hose?
Hare spray.
If your canoe turns upside down in the water, you can wear it on your head.
Because it’s capsized.
What do you call it when it rains ducks and geese?
Fowl weather.
Why did the lake date the river?
He heard that she had a bubbly personality.
Which weighs less; butane, gasoline or water?
Butane, because it's lighter fluid.
How do you make holy water?
By boiling the hell out of it.
Why couldn’t the fish watch YouTube?
He couldn’t stream the video.
I don't know if I just got hit by freezing rain, but it hurt like hail.
Does a water bed become bouncier when you fill it up with spring water?
What did Snoop Dog need to get an umbrella?
Fo’ Drizzle.
If a hole isn't full of water then it isn't feeling well
How did the raindrop ask another raindrop on a date?
He asked her “Water you doing tonight?”
I was so disappointed when I went to the court house themed restaurant and all they gave me was frozen water.
Justice was served.
Did you hear about the ocean and sea having a baby?
It was a buoy!
It's really easy to learn white water kayaking
You just go with the flow.
Why is a river an amazing roommate?
He just likes to go with the flow.
If Smart water were actually smart…
Then why did it get bottled?
Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water?
Because he was a little horse!
Why did the ocean leave the party early?
She was getting really tide.
Why does the river have problems remembering things?
Because she is becoming sea nile.
What do you call it when a guy throws his laptop into the ocean?
Adele, Rollin’ in the Deep.
What do you call two days of rain in a row in Seattle?
The weekend.
The weatherman said it might get a bit drizzly outside.
You can expect a Lil’ Wayne.
My friend couldn't afford to pay his water bill.
So I sent him a “get well soon” card.
What can you do if you are the ocean?
Watever you want.
Did you hear about the scientist who was lab partners with a pot of boiling water?
He had a very esteemed colleague.
How do cows intake water?
by Osmoosis.
Why do sharks only swim in salt water?
Because pepper always makes them sneeze.
What is another king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Reign!
How do you know if an ant is a boy or a girl?
If you toss it in the water and it sinks, it’s a girl. If the ant floats, it’s a buoyant.
What did the bottled water tell the spy?
The names bond, Hydrogen bond.
What did the egg say to the boiling water?
I might have some trouble getting hard, I just got laid this morning!
What do you call water that is good for you?
Well water.
What happens before it starts raining candy?
It sprinkles!
When you mix a salt and water, you get a solution. When you mix a salt and battery, you get arrested.
What did the fish say when it ran into the wall?
Dam.
What did one body of water say to the other?
"Do you sea what I sea?"
You can tell an ant’s gender by putting it in the water.
If it sinks, it’s a girl. If it floats, it’s a buoyant.
What do you call a wet teddy bear?
A drizzly bear.
What is the king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Hail, of course!
H20 is water, but what is H204?
It’s for swimming and drinking, of course.
A parishioner at my church broke into the holy water tank and splashed some on his infant daughter, saying, "your are hereby baptized!"
That's just not rite.
When does it start to rain money?
When there is change in the weather.
Did you ever hear the joke about the three holes in the ground?
Well, well, well.
Why did the ocean break up with the pond?
She thought he was too shallow.
What do you call it when you get a month’s worth of rain at once?
England.
How do you make holy water?
Make sure to boil the hell out of it.