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Fighting Jokes

Color Puns
Blue and green stopped fighting because they had agreed on peace teal.
Grass Puns
Crabgrass in my lawn is always fighting to prevent good grass seed from rooting...
Guess you could say I'm caught in the middle of a turf war
Utensils Puns
I got tired of fighting straw...
So I hit the hay.
Fly Puns
Two flies were fighting on a toilet seat.
One got pissed.
Closet Puns
What happens when a closet goes into fighting?
It turns into a wardrobe.
Knight Puns
Why was the knight fighting the tournament with a sword made from cheddar cheese? Because the cheese was extra sharp!
There were two knights who were fighting a long duel with each other. The fight ended when one of them chopped off the other's leg- guess the knight was defeeted.
Funny Marriage Quotes
"After about 15 years I finally figured out that she's always right. So surprisingly we just stopped fighting after that." —Barack Obama
Easter Puns
"Every bunny was kung fu fighting."
One Liners and Short Jokes
How do you stop two blind men from fighting?
You yell, “look out, he's got a knife!"
Pumpkin Puns
Why do pumpkins never quarrel? Because they have no stomach for fighting.
Onion Puns
Which venue did all the vegetables choose to open their fighting club in? An onion ring!
Vaccine Puns
My wife asked, “If someone’s body just isn’t fighting the virus, would getting the vaccine help?”
I told her I think it’s worth a shot.
Gorilla Puns
Did you hear about the 2 apes that kept fighting with each other?
It was gorilla warfare.
Jokes For Women
What do you call 2 guys fighting over a slut? Tug-of-whore.