"You can't skele-run from my skele-puns."
"Dying to have fun."
"Do you play the trom-bone?"
"Bugs and hisses."
"Some people have no guts."
"Laughing 'til I'm coffin."
"Bone to be wild."
"Lazy bones."
How do two skeletons have se*?
They bone each other.
Why are skeletons such bad liars?
Everyone can see right through them.
What is a skeleton’s favorite plant?
A bone-zai tree.
How do skeleton’s get their mail delivered?
By the bony express.
What do you call a skeleton who lies?
A phoney-ba-boney.
Why couldn’t the skeleton get out of bed?
He was bone tired.
What did the doctor tell the skeleton who wanted to donate his body to science?
Spine on the dotted line.
Why can’t a legless skeleton win an argument?
They don’t have a leg to stand on.
Why didn’t one skeleton want to look at the other skeleton?
He didn’t have the stomach for it.
How do you know if a spine finds you funny?
It starts cracking up.
What do you say when you go to a dinner with a bunch of osteopathologists?
Bone appetit!
Did you hear about the skeleton that was almost picked apart by a group of wild dogs?
He marrowly escaped.
Why can’t a group of skeletons ever get anything done?
It’s a skeleton crew.
Where do you imprison a naughty skeleton?
A rib cage.
Why do skeletons get sick on windy days?
It goes right through them.
What did the osteopathic medicine doctor bring to the potluck?
Spare ribs.
Why are bones so calm?
Nothing gets under their skin.
Why was the skeleton so lonely?
He had no body.
Why was the skeleton stupid?
He was a numskull.
What do you call a funny bone?
A humerus.
What’s the coolest part of a skeleton?
The hip.
Why did the skeleton start a fight?
He had a bone to pick.
Why does a skeleton always tell the truth?
He wants tibia honest.
What do you call it when a skeleton is having a great time?
An osteoblast.
Where do you learn about bones?
Osteoclasst.