The repair man said he thought he'd fixed the propane stoves, but he couldn't be quite sure.
After all, it involved a lot of gaswork.
Why did the hipster chemist get burnt?
Because he touched the beaker before it was cool.
Never trust an atom. They make up everything.
Why were the Vikings such good sailors?
You can lead a Norse to water but you can't make him sink.
Dear Algebra, Please stop asking us to find your X.
She’s never coming back—don’t ask Y.
Did you hear about the zygote that joined the army?
I heard he was diploid.
In the old times, the medieval kings and queens would only visit the dentist just before their coronation. This is because they wanted their teeth crowned!
What would the pharaoh say after seeing the pyramid? He would name it mummy's home.
The paper my student wrote on Tsar Ivan was so bad, it was tearable.
One night, a Viking called Rudolph the red was looking out of his window when he suddenly said, "It's going to rain."
His wife asked, "How do you know?"
"Because Rudolph the red knows rain, dear."
I keep making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon.
The recipe said, “set the oven to 180 degrees”...
Now I can’t open the door because it faces the wall.
I feel uncomfortable next to my fridge
It's way too cool for me
Last Christmas, I got my sister a build-it-yourself medieval fort. She wasn't very happy with it, but my mother reprimanded her by saying that it isn't the gift, but the fort that counts!
How does the mother call the pharaoh son to the table?
Tutan, come on.
After having learned the history of chess, I have come to the conclusion that all chess players have quite a checkered past.
What did Communists use to light their houses before candles? Electricity.
What penalty in hockey uses the most amount of energy?
A power play.
What did Sparticus do to the cannibal who ate his nagging wife?
Nothing, he's gladiator.
I googled 'lost medieval servant boy'
The result was 'This page cannot be found.'
What do you call a kangaroo who watches too much TV?
A pouch potato.
Why was Cleopatra so in love with Egypt's ruler?
Pharaohmones
Why are geologists good at stand up comedy?
They know really “dirty” jokes.
Why did the man eat the light bulb? He was hoping it would give him a bright idea.”
What did the old Egyptian get by staring at the river?
See-Nile!
The medieval queen was unhappy when she saw that it was pouring outside. She sighed to herself, "This could be another reigny day."
What do you call someone who specialises in Egypt?
A Cairopractor.
Have you heard the fast gladiator that was a tumor covered in dough?
He was a Roamin' Tumor Roll.
Where in the World Can You Find the Highest Concentration of Engineers?
Antarctica! Because that's where all the P. Enguins are!
Henry VIII had breathing troubles - he had no heir!
Q: What was the pharaoh's favorite football team?
A: The Mummy Dolphins
Geology rocks but Geography is where it's at.
I started making lamps in the shape of the alphabet.
After the first three, it was a D-light.
Julius Caesar
Was a well dressed romaine.
What instrument never fails to energize a crowd?
An electric guitar.
What leads people to Rome?
The scents.
They want some aROMAtherapy.
What is an outlet’s favorite song?
I’ve Got The Power.
These days, knights love to watch movies, and their favorite genre is the horror and the action genre. Also, I am pretty sure that their favorite movie is 'Knight Of The Living Dead.'
What do you get if you put kisses in a blender?
A Smoochie.
I caught my friend harassing some electricity. I told him it was an abuse of power.”
My vaccine dad joke failed.
But it was worth a shot.
What should you put on the tomb stone of a mathematician?
"He didn't count on this."
What's a freezer's favorite time period?
The ice age!
What did the Egyptian Pharaoh do when he got caught in traffic?
ANKH ANKH!!
What kind of snake does your math teacher probably own?
A pi-thon.
My landlord said we need to talk about how high my heating bill is.
I replied: “Sure, my door is always open.”
Why didn't the Romans have algebra?
Because X always equaled 10!
Whats The Most tiniest Virus Ever? "smallpox".
I can't touch my aunt or I will explode.
She's made of auntie matter.
What is the difference between a geologist and a chemist? A chemist will drink anything that is distilled. A geologist will drink anything that is fermented.