Why did the toddler chew on pebbles? He wanted to eat rock candy.
How do geologists like to relax?
In rocking chairs, of course!
Does anyone remember the joke about the sodium deposits? Na.
Watson: Sherlock, what type of rock is this amazing specimen?
Holmes: It’s sedimentary, my dear Watson.
You want to hear the best rock puns? Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
What did the gold say to the pyrite? You’re a fool and a fake!
Did you hear about the metamorphosis professor who just gave up on life? He really needed a change.
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.
What do you call a can of soda in a conglomerate? Coca-Cola Clastic.
What did the teenage rock say after failing its drive test? I don’t want to talc about it.
What happens if someone chucks a rock at you? You hit the rock’s bottom.
Why should you never expect perfection from geologists?
Because they all have their faults.
Have a gneiss day! This is one of the simplest rock puns, but it is certainly a gneiss way to start your day out right!
Where do rocks like to sleep? In bedrocks!
What do rocks eat?
Pom-a-granites.
Why can’t minerals ever lie?
They’re always in their pure form.
I really hate rock puns.
My sediments exactly.
Why is the world so diverse?
Because it contains alkynes of people.
Why do earth science professors always talk about ammonia? Because it’s basic material.
What happens when you blend sulfur, tungsten and silver together? SWAG.
Why should you never tell jokes about radon, cobalt and yttrium? They are just too CoRnY.
You want to hear the best rock puns?
Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
This rock was magma before it was cool.
Get it?
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white?
Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
If I could change the periodic table, I would put Uranium and Iodine next to each other.
What did the rock say to the word processor?
Boulder.
What did the chemist cowboy tell his horse? HIO Ag!
What happens when you keep reading geology jokes in your free time? You know that you have really hit rock bottom.
When were rock puns the funniest?
During the stone age.
Rock was magma before it was cool.
If H20 is water, then what is H204? It’s for drinking, washing and swimming, of course!
What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano? I really lava you!
Why are geologists great dates?
They can make your bedrock.
Why did the tectonic plates break up? It wasn’t her fault, but there was just too much friction between them.
Why is the world so diverse? Because it contains alkynes of people.
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms?
A ferrous wheel.
What type of fruit includes Barium and double Sodium? BaNaNa.
Where do rocks like to sleep?
In bedrocks!