What do you call a rock that never goes to school? A skipping stone!
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white? Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
Did you hear about the metamorphosis professor who just gave up on life? He really needed a change.
Why did the tectonic plates break up?
It wasn’t her fault, but there was just too much friction between them.
I really hate rock puns.
My sediments exactly.
What did the rock say to the word processor?
Boulder.
Watson: Sherlock, what type of rock is this amazing specimen?
Holmes: It’s sedimentary, my dear Watson.
How do geologists like to relax?
In rocking chairs, of course!
Why did the fold get arrested?
Because it was caught rolling a joint.
If I could change the periodic table, I would put Uranium and Iodine next to each other.
Where do rocks like to sleep?
In bedrocks!
What did the teenage rock say after failing its drive test? I don’t want to talc about it.
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white?
Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
What did the chemist cowboy tell his horse? HIO Ag!
What type of weapon can you make with potassium, iron and nickel? A KniFe.
Why can’t minerals ever lie? They’re always in their pure form.
This rock was magma before it was cool.
Get it?
What did the gold say to the pyrite? You’re a fool and a fake!
What happens if someone chucks a rock at you? You hit the rock’s bottom.
Why did the toddler chew on pebbles? He wanted to eat rock candy.
What kind of magazine does a rock like to read?
Rolling Stone.
Why was the sedimentary rock extra cheap?
Because it was on shale.
If H20 is water, then what is H204? It’s for drinking, washing and swimming, of course!
What did the metamorphic rock say during the test? This is too much pressure!
Have a gneiss day! This is one of the simplest rock puns, but it is certainly a gneiss way to start your day out right!
What is the difference between a chemist and a geologist? While a geologist will drink anything fermented, a chemist just
drinks anything that is distilled.
Does anyone remember the joke about the sodium deposits? Na.
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.
What do rocks eat?
Pom-a-granites.
Where do rocks like to sleep? In bedrocks!
Why is the world so diverse? Because it contains alkynes of people.
Why are mountains not just funny? Because they are hilarious.
Why should you never tell jokes about radon, cobalt and yttrium? They are just too CoRnY.
Why can’t minerals ever lie?
They’re always in their pure form.
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms?
A ferrous wheel.
You want to hear the best rock puns?
Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
What do you call an Irish gem that’s a fake?
A sham rock.
What type of fruit includes Barium and double Sodium? BaNaNa.