I was gonna make a river joke, but I don't think it's current.
I took a walk down by the river the other day and I heard two birds speaking Spanish...
Turns out they were Portu-Geese.
I have a butcher friend in London. Last week he caught a huge sea creature in the river there and made it into sausage. It was the beast of Thames. It was the wurst of Thames.
What did the priest say at the flooding river?
God, dam it!
I'm debating whether I should cross the river on foot or use my rowboat...
It's row v. wade.
Why did the River go to the doctor? Her flow wouldn't stop.
If your boat turns upside down in the river, you can wear it on your head because it's capsized.
The ocean cut off all ties with the river, because the river turned out to be too shallow.
What is the most depressed river in Southern Europe? The Crimea River.
As I am walking towards my classroom, I get to know that my miss-is-sippi-ng my glass of water.
The man got shocked when he got down in the river because the river current was too strong.
Don't get tide-up in sorrows, you will only cry a river.
what do you call the smaller rivers that run into the nile?
The juveniles
Last night the river was arrested. The river was accused of illegal streaming.
Why did the river refuse to join the sea? Because the sea was salty.
What's the fastest thing on the river bed?
A motor-pike and side-carp.
Rivers are...
the original streaming service.
Why are you bringing me to this mountain river after our couple therapy session?!
Our therapist said I need to valley date you.
I'm reading a book called "The Yellow River"
It's written by I.P. Freely
Why didn't the hipster swim in the river? It was too mainstream.
The lake did not like the river because it felt that the river was not very lake-able.
I like rivers very much. I was watching a live stream earlier.
Took the family on a whitewater rafting trip, and first time we came to a sudden descent in the river, we lost everything...
That was just one of the downfalls!
What's the difference between Amazon Prime and the Amazon River? The Amazon River actually has sails.
Where do fish wash? In a river basin.
Why are small dried up river beds so cool? Because they're ex-stream.
Why did two fishes go to the riverbank? They wanted to withdraw their fins.
The river fish went to the library and asked if he can get a book. The librarian said: "You can start by-rowing it."
Every time I passed a ring-shaped coral reef with a coral rim that encircles a lagoon, I had to pay a fee. It was atoll.
What is the name of the car that passes through the narrow stream of the river? Fjord.
You have to act quickly during a flood because it's an emergent sea.
What did the monochrome say to the rainbow?
Oh no! My arch nemesis!
Why did the River need Jesus? It was dammed.
Have you heard about the banker who drowned in a river? It was a river of cash.
I thought I was swimming in the river Thames, but apparently I made it all the way to France before I realized I'm in Seine.
The scientists decided to clean up the Thames because it had a dirty mouth.
In what state is the Amazon River? It is in the liquid state.
Did you know the Mississippi River is a girl?
If it was a guy it would be the misterssippi River.
What did the sea say to the river? You can run but you can't tide.
What do you call an old snowman? A creek.
What did Sherlock Holmes say to Watson when he noticed sandstone deposits on the river bank? "It's sedimentary, my dear Watson."
Two fish are swimming in a river, when one of them hits a concrete wall. He turns to the other and says: "Dam"
How much do you love rainbows? Just a skittle bit.
The river turned out to be a great party guy because he just went with the flow.
The dock keeps floating above the river because of the pier- pressure.
Where do fish keep their money? In river banks.
I enjoy throwing coins in the river and watching them. I like studying my cash flow.
What did the river sue for?
Beaver damage.
The insane amount of rainfall in Poland did not lead the river to flood, all was in Oder.
One time, while visiting a river town, my brother was hungry and I fed him freshly made stream buns.