What did the dessert say to the Granny Smith tree?
You’re the apple of my pie.
What did the snowman and his wife put over their baby’s crib?
A snowmobile!
Why do toadstools grow so close to each other? They do not need mushroom to grow.
Local weather reports state there won't be any rain for 1 year, but I drought it.
I don't know if I just got hit by freezing rain, but it hurt like hail.
Why was the boxer fired from his job?
He never punched out.
Why don’t clams give to charity?
Because they’re shellfish!
How does the weather tie its shoes? Witha rainbow!
What words do windmills live by? One good turn deserves another!
How do you know flowers are capable of kissing?
They have tulips.
What happens before it starts raining candy?
It sprinkles!
Did you hear about the metamorphosis professor who just gave up on life? He really needed a change.
Which tree is more annoying, pine or oak?
Pine. Because pine needles while oak leaves.
Are you squiding me right now?
A mountain biker was chased by a Grizzly this morning. He bearly made it.
How do two rival forests get along? They sign a peace tree-ty!
What do you call it when you get a month’s worth of rain at once?
England.
Tropic like it's hot.
After the rain has cleared and the sun comes out, rainbows are so quick to appear they'll red like wildfire.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
What falls all the time and never gets hurt? Rain.
My father decided to mow the lawn today. As he mowed, all the grass blade.
What do baleen whales call a hook-up?
Netflix and krill.
What is the ocean’s favorite lullaby?
Roe, Roe, Roe Your Boat.
What do you call a tooth in a glass full of water?
A one molar solution.
How are bad school grades like a shipwreck in the Arctic Ocean? They're both below C level!
What did fog do to make the captain angry? He mist the boat.
Why are trees a popular Christmas decoration? They look good in boughs.
There are so much beautiful sceneries near the river valleys. They are totally gorges.
What happens when you blend an artificial waterway with a tree? You get a root canal.
Why don’t Native Americans like to do rain dances in April anymore?
Because April showers bring Mayflowers.
Please excuse my resting beach face.
What do you call a slow skier?
A slopepoke!
What do you call a snowman party?
A snowball.
I have a good nature joke but after listening to it, everyone just leaves.
Q: What do you call it when it rains chickens and ducks?
A: Fowl weather.
You have to act quickly during a flood because it's an emergent sea.
Why was the bucket so embarrassed at the beach?
Because of how pail it was.
How does a Snowman get to work?
By icicle.
Do you know what would happen when you throw a Finnish sailor into the ocean?
Helsinki.
What do you call a rock that never goes to school?
A skipping stone!
The lake did not like the river because it felt that the river was not very lake-able.
What did the beaver say after she slipped in water?
Dam it.
Why are trees such great thieves? They really have sticky fingers.
When you look at the sky and see the moon
You're looking at a subtle light
Q: What do you call a windmill swallowed up by a tornado?
A: A wind meal
You can't blame anyone if you fall in your driveway due to snowy weather...
Because that's your own asphalt.
Today I helped father-in-law to fix his plants
it was very grounding.
Because it was so foggy at my father’s funeral, he was buried in the wrong plot.
It was a grave mist-stake.
"Someone's stolen the grass from my garden," said the man looking forlorn.