How much do you love rainbows? Just a skittle bit.
In my village, there is a farmer who takes his cows to refill their food at the grass station.
What do you call a snowman party?
A snowball.
I can sea clearly now.
When can your cup of coffee tell the weather?
When it's muggy.
Why does the mermaid wear seashells?
Because she grew out of her B-shells.
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing?
Au revoir.
What do snowmen wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
What kind of magazine does a rock like to read?
Rolling Stone.
What did one blade of grass say to another about the lack of rain?
I guess we'll just have to make dew.
In the mushroom bus, one mushroom said to the other, "Please scoot over, there is not mush room."
Fancy a climb? Mount me in.
Went camping last night. It was in-tents.
What is Jack Frost’s favourite mode of transport?
A Tr-Ice-cycle
Everyone said the wind was powerful. So, I went outside and was blown away.
Can you tell me what type of weeping tree this is? Yes, but you willow me one later.
How do you wash clothes at the beach?
With Tide.
Pennies and quarters rain from the sky
"Wow!" I say. "It's climate change!"
What do you call a can of pop found in a conglomerate?
Coca-Cola Clastic.
I’m going to start a YouTube channel where I critique bottled water...
It’s an untapped market.
If a tree had a mouth, wood it bark?
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
Don't get tide down.
What falls all the time and never gets hurt? Rain.
Why are oceans so meticulous?
They like to be pacific.
Why was the sedimentary rock extra cheap?
Because it was on shale.
I always invite the mushroom to my party because he is such a fun-guy.
If a hole isn't full of water then it isn't feeling well
Rivers are...
the original streaming service.
Why won’t the mushroom buy a couch? - He prefers toadstools.
Two rocks at the bottom of a mountain. First rock: Avalanche!
Second rock: Ha! I'm not gonna fall for that again!
What did the nut tree say when his wife left him? I walnut stand for this!
What happens when you keep reading geology jokes in your free time? You know that you have really hit rock bottom.
Q: What did the tree say to the wind?
A: Leaf me alone
Why are leaves always getting into risky business? They keep having to go out on a limb.
What do you call it when a guy throws his laptop into the ocean?
Adele, Rollin’ in the Deep.
A magician wearing a rainbow colored coat is called Hue-dini.
Tis the sea-sun.
When were rock puns the funniest?
During the stone age.
Did you hear of the story of the tornado? There is a twist at the end.
What types of plants do you get after you plant kisses? Tulips.
I just got my degree in Sky Diving.
I had to drop out to graduate.
What did the snowman eat?
Icebergs with chilli sauce.
Humpty Dumpty had a terrible summer, but he sure had a great fall.
Dad has a pet snake that eats the grass in his yard.
It's a lawnboa.
What pickup line did the flower use on Tinder?
Are you a DAMNdelion?
There's snow place like the mountains in winter.
It's ok to be negative if you find yourself in a thunderstorm.
You probably won't get struck by lightning.
I have a hiking playlist with songs from the Peanuts, the Cranberries, and Eminem. I call it my trail mix.
Do you want to hear a joke about a bolt of lightning?
Actually, maybe not. The end is rather shocking.