How does the spinal cord hammer a nail into a wall?
With a series of spinal taps.
Why did the neuron like to sleep in the top bunk bed?
It wanted to have a high resting potential.
What did the hippocampus say during its retirement speech?
"Thanks for the memories."
What is a brain's favorite kind of boat?
A cranial blood vessel.
Why is the left cerebral cortex always wrong?
Because it was never in the rgiht.
What do you get when you cross a thought with a light bulb?
A bright idea.
An action potential takes the train to school. What is the name of the train station where it gets off for school?
Axon terminal.
What dinner dish does a developing neuron use?
A neural plate.
What is a good pick-up line an axon terminal can use on a dendrite?
"Let's connect."
What does a zombie say as he squishes your brains between his fingers?
Got your knows.
Why are neuroanatomy classes the smartest?
They have lots of brains.
What type of photos do neurons post to Facebook?
Cellfies.
My friend built an aromatherapy vaporiser with a built-in brain scanner
Seems a bit out there, but makes scents when you think about it.
How do you mess up a brain, on paper?
With a few strokes.
Why are sponges and brains similar?
They both like to soak up "material"
Why do mummies like myelin?
Because of all the wrapping.
I had a dream I was looking for my brain
But it was all in my head.
What did the axon terminal say to the receptor when they broke up?
I need my space.
What does the visual system use to play basketball?
Eyeballs.
Why was the neuron sent to the principal's office?
It had trouble controlling its impulses.
Why did the action potential cross the optic chiasm?
To get to the other side.
What did the brain say after it got an electrical shock?
"This was a stimulating experience."
What did parietal say to frontal?
"I lobe you."
Why did the brain go into a group of trees to sleep?
For rest. (forest)
What did the right hemisphere say to the left hemisphere when they could not agree on anything?
Let's split.
What did the angry brain say to the nociceptor?
"You're a real pain."
What happens if you break the brain scanner?
What do you call the shirt a neurosurgeon wears to every brain surgery?
His specialty.
What is the brain's favorite television channel?
The Neural Network.
What do you call a group of brains who form a singing group at school?
A glia club.
Why were the two retinas such good friends?
They always saw eye-to-eye.
What is a sleeping brain's favorite musical group (rock band)?
REM.
When is a synapse like a tree?
When it is pruned.
When does it rain brains?
During a brain storm.
I didn't want to have brain surgery but I had to.
I guess it changed my mind.
Why are fish so smart?
They spend a lot of time in schools.
If some of Fred Flintstone's neurotransmitters could talk, what would they say?
"Gaba-Daba-Do!"
What kind of fish performs brain surgery?
A neurosturgeon.
Did you know there's a college in the brain for hippopotami?
It's called the Hippocampus.
What do neurons do on their birthdays?
They cell-ebrate
What part of the brain deals with knowledge about plants?
The treefrontal cortex.
Why can't a brain be 12 inches long?
Becuase then it would be a foot.
If your dog was a neurologist, what would it do all day?
Perform PET scans.
Which cranial nerve would be right at home in a well-known city in Nevada?
The vagus nerve.
What did the stimulus do to the neuron after they got married?
Carried it over the threshold.
What street does the hippocampus live on?
Memory lane.
Why didn't the brain want to take a bath?
Why does the spinal cord belong in the brass section of an orchestra?
Because of its dorsal and ventral horns.
The real reason humans have wrinkly brains?
We've been in the gene pool too long.
A brain aneurysm would be swell.
What do you call a hat for the brain?
A thinking cap.