My wrists hurt whenever I drive to work with my co-workers and we go through a tunnel.
I think it's carpool tunnel syndrome.
Why do mummies like myelin?
Because of all the wrapping.
What do you call a crazy blood-sucking parasite?
A lunatick!
I can't stand when people kick me in the back of the leg.
What do neurons do on their birthdays?
They cell-ebrate
How do you mess up a brain, on paper?
With a few strokes.
A monk, a priest and a rabbit walk into a blood bank.
The rabbit says "I think I'm a type o"
Saw my dad outside with a tv antenna on his head
When I asked him why, he said he was trying to get more in tune with nature.
If your canoe turns upside down in the water, you can wear it on your head.
Because it’s capsized.
That girl must be a premature contraction as she makes my heart skip a beat.
I bring my knees to my head and lean forwards.
That's just how I roll.
Someone asked me to sing a line from "Don't go breaking my heart"
I couldn't if I tried.
I heard about a football player who had a heart attack and collapsed on top of his opponent.
He was dead on a rival.
Where do you learn about bones?
Osteoclasst.
My wife bought me an expensive umbrella and she’s been holding it over my head ever since.
Why are neuroanatomy classes the smartest?
They have lots of brains.
A man walks into a bar with a chunk of asphalt under his arm.
He goes up to the bartender and says "A drink please and another for the road."
What did the osteopathic medicine doctor bring to the potluck?
Spare ribs.
Near the town of Hannah Montana people found a dinosaur skeleton.
Scientists identified it as a Mileysaurus.
How did the frog feel when he hurt his leg?
Unhoppy