Beach Puns

Time to get a tan and a full dose of humor! So head on over to the Beach Puns to get the best of both.

Beach Puns

What happens when you go to the beach in hell?
You get a SaTan.
What do you call someone with Yellow hair on the beach?
A beach blond.
What did the retired pirate say when he went to the beach?
Long time no sea.
Why did the obtuse Triangle go to the beach?
Because it was more than 90°.
If you go to a beach and you can see through it, you could say the coast is clear.
Where’s the best beach to buy sports gear at?
Jersey Shore.
How do you wash clothes at the beach?
With Tide.
What do Ents wear to the beach?
Sandalwood.
What do they use to get a tan?
Palm oil.
I invented beach footwear for people with one leg.
It was a flop.
What did the ocean say when asked if he wanted to be friends with the beach?
“Shore!”
What do you call dumb jokes at the beach?
Comic sands.
You can bet on firemen at the beach.
It's a shore-fire thing.
Son: “Hey Dad, can we go to the beach?”
Dad: “Shore?”
What do you call a waffle laying on a beach?
Sandy eggo.
What do you call a boy swimming at the beach?
Buoyancy.
I was at the beach and saw this guy in the water yelling, “Help, shark! Help!
I just laughed because I knew that shark wasn’t going to help him.
My wife refused to go to a nude beach with me
I can't believe she is so clothes-minded.
What do you call a Grizzly at a nude beach?
Bear Naked.
Did you hear about the boat that crashed into the beach?
The captain fell asleep and the crew didn't realize until they were already in the no wake zone.
What book of the bible do you read on a beach?
The book of psalms trees.
Why don’t elephants go to the beach?
Because their trunks always fall down.
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Thanks for all the sediment.
Why do bananas have to put on sunscreen before they go to the beach?
Because they might peel.
Why was the bucket so embarrassed at the beach?
Because of how pail it was.
How can you tell that it’s Ronald McDonald at a nude beach?
Because he has sesame seed buns.
I used to search for clams on the beach
But then I pulled a mussel.
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing it just waved.
A cowboy and a Mexican were walking side-by-side by a beach in Mexico. The Cowboy asked to the Mexican if the Gulf of Mexico was an ocean.
"Sea, Señor," replied the Mexican.
They told me they were handing out free beef at the beach...
When I arrived I realized it was a bay-con.
eople say they never get hungry at the beach
That’s because there’s sand, which is everywhere.
The bartender asks one of The Beach Boys what they’d like, so he looks back to his friends
“Get a round?” “Round?” “Round?” “I’ll get a round!”
I asked the land beside the ocean if he was certain he wasn't beach.
But he was pretty shore.
My sister said I would never be able to make a beach pun.
Is seashore about that?
Beach you to it.
I can sea clearly now.
Sorry, I'm octopied.
Sea you at the beach.
Life's a beach. Enjoy the waves.
Are you squiding me right now?
Beach, please.
All you need is a good dose of vitamin sea.
Whale, hello there.
Love the beach. Can I be any more Pacific?
Lost at sea? I'm not shore.
If there's a will, there's a wave.
Please excuse my resting beach face.
Salty but sweet.
Shell yeah.
Tis the sea-sun.
Avoid pier pressure.