Winter Jokes

Did Texas survive last week's winter storms?
Burrrrrrrrrrrrrrly.
There's snow place like the mountains in winter.
My friend, while driving through the mountains watching the leaves change: I love the winter. All the naked trees.
Me: Yeah, you can see all their knotty parts.
I barely noticed you in the winter months, you were missing from the sky.
How do you dry clothes on a line in winter?
You freeze dry them.
Mother always knows best. But when winter comes around, Mother Nature snows best.
I wanted to be a professional fortune-teller but I wasn't very good at it. I could only predict when there would be bad winter storms. Well, turns out I had been using a snow globe.
Whenever someone wishes me to say "Happy Winter," it always leaves me cold.
The winter is the worst time of year for a wedding. The grooms always seem to be getting cold feet.
You're hot enough for both of us during winter.
What do you call hot dogs in winter? Chilly dogs!
Winter does not arrive until the ice is in the compost heap. Spring does not arrive until the ice is out of the compost.
"When we put vegetables up for the winter, we use jars, but we call it canning. I find that jarring. And uncanny."
– Greg Tamblyn
Why do flamingos fly south in winter? Because it would be too far to walk.
You warm my heart more than the salted caramel hot chocolate on a cold winter day.
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