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Oh Jokes

Funny Poems
Oh my beloved belly button.
The squidgy ring in my midriff mutton.
Your mystery is such tricky stuff:
Why are you so full of fluff?
(Richard Leavesley)
Whosever room this is should be ashamed!
His underwear is hanging on the lamp.
His raincoat is there in the overstuffed chair,
And the chair is becoming quite mucky and damp.
His workbook is wedged in the window,
His sweaterโ€™s been thrown on the floor.
His scarf and one ski are beneath the TV,
And his pants have been carelessly hung on the door.
His books are all jammed in the closet,
His vest has been left in the hall.
A lizard named Ed is asleep in his bed,
And his smelly old sock has been stuck to the wall.
Whosever room this is should be ashamed!
Donald or Robert or Willie orโ€”
Huh? You say itโ€™s mine? Oh, dear,
I knew it looked familiar!
(Shel Silverstein)
Funny Birthday Poems
Birthdays are sometimes hard to observe
Many people think they are for the birds.
Well, when I look at your age
I can see why you are at that stage.

Where did the years go
Another birthday, oh no
It only seemed like yesterday
We celebrated your birthday.

Oh who cares about age
Don't let it discourage
Be happy and just say
It is just another day!

(Catherine Pulsifer)
Coffee Shop Pick Up Lines
Careful of that Earl Grey, itโ€™s super hot! Oh wait, you donโ€™t need to worry. Itโ€™s not as hot as you.
The Beatles Pick Up Lines
It's been a hard day's night without your lovin', Oh darling.
Classic Pick Up Lines
Hi. Do you remember me? Oh, thatโ€™s rightโ€”weโ€™ve only met in my dreams.
Deer Puns
Q. What does a doe say When something very unexpected happens?
A. Oh, Deer God!
What did the disappointed deer say? Oh deer!
Halloween Pick Up Lines
No costume? Oh you lucky girl, you donโ€™t need Halloween. You look like an angel every day.
Language Pick Up Lines
There are 21 letters in the alphabet right? Oh wait, I forgot u, r, a, q, t.
Food Poems
For breakfast I had ice cream
With pickles sliced up in it;
For lunch, some greasy pork chops
Gobbled in a minute;
Dinner? Clams and orange pop,
And liverwurst, slicked thick---
And now, oops! Oh pardon me!
I'm going to be sick!

(William Cole)
If I Had a Dollar... Jokes
If I had a nickel for every nickel I have... Oh wait, I do. Nevermind.
Space Pick Up Lines
Is that the Helix Nebula Iโ€™m currently observing? Oh sorry! Thatโ€™s your eyes.
Grocery Store Pick Up Lines
Do you know which aisle the edible underwear is in? Oh, wait, wrong store!
Canadian Pick Up Lines
Oh I didn't mean to pull you in so close. I thought I heard a rutting bull moose.
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