Hold Jokes

In your hands my heart is clay, To take and hold as you may.
Chopping down other people’s cherry trees is definitely frowned upon. However, you likely won’t get into too much trouble for it – as long as you keep hold of the axe!
While fishing in the blue lagoon,
I caught a lovely silver fish,
And he spoke to me, "My boy," quoth he,
"Please set me free and I'll grant your wish;
A kingdom of wisdom? A palace of gold?
Or all the fancies your mind can hold?"
And I said, "O.K." and I set him free,
But he laughed at me as he swam away,
And left me whispering my wish
Into a silent sea.

Today I caught that fish again
(That lovely silver prince of fishes),
And once again he offered me,
If I would only set him free,
Any one of a number of wishes,
If I would throw him back to the fishes.

He was delicious!!

(Shel Silverstein)
“No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation."
- Fran Lebowitz
“If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way.”

- Mark Twain.
I need an Imodium because I can't hold in my love for you.
If I told you you have a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
Your hand looks heavy—can I hold it for you?
"If I hold a can of soda up to my ear and listen carefully, I can hear my bones pleading for a glass of milk."
– Bridger Winegar
Hold me tight dear and I promise to send all my loving to you.
Can I hold your hand?
When this planet is invaded by the aliens, I’d still hold your hand.
Can you hold my gloves for a second? I usually warm them by the fireplace, but you are way hotter.
Are you a fermata? Because I want to hold you.
Hold the sugar, please. You're sweet enough for me.
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