Short Funny Quotes
“Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.”
George Burns
“The worst part of online shopping is having to get up and get your credit card from your purse.”
Having rumpled clothing is a pressing issue, but I am sure that I can iron out a solution.
Did you hear about the ocean and sea having a baby?
It was a buoy!
Having a ball this weekend with my best friends
Having a ball
A logician's wife is having a baby. The doctor immediately hands the newborn to the dad. The wife says, "Is it a boy or a girl?" The logician says, "Yes."
Zebras aren’t fans of colouring books. They don’t like having to stay between the lions.
I saw a guy trying to cross a really busy street. Trying to be helpful, I said, “You know, there is a zebra crossing 50ft ahead.”
He said, “I hope he’s having a better luck than I am.”
I rushed to my local hospital only to find that it had been converted into a library
Talk about having to suffer in silence
Why did the house go to the doctor?
It was having window panes.
Why do men name their penises? Because they don't like the idea of having a stranger make 90 percent of their decisions.
What do you call an Irish dancer having a heart attack?
Michael flatline.
An Australian chess player went into a restaurant and ordered food. After having his food , the waiter asked him "Cash or Credit , Sir?"
He said "Cheque , mate."
The high school music teacher was controversial for having his students read band books.