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Mickey Mouse at Court
Mickey Mouse at Court Mickey and Minnie Mouse were at court for divorce proceedings. The judge told Mickey, "Look here Mickey Mouse, I can't grant you a divorce from Minnie!"  Mickey Mouse was stunned and asked, "Why not???"  The Judge said, "I've reviewed all the information you gave to the court, but I can't find any evidence at all to support the grounds that she is crazy!"  Mickey Mouse says, "Your Honor! I didn't say she was CRAZY, I said she was f**ing Goofy!"
The slogan of a televangelist
"God will grant you all the money I need."
What do you get when you cross a dog and an octopus?

A reprimand from the Scientific Morals and Ethics Committee and an immediate cessation of your grant funding.