Foods Jokes

“It just occurred to me that the majority of my diet is made up of the foods that my kid didn’t finish.”

- Carrie Underwood.

Why do bacon lettuce and tomatoes have the lowest IQ out of all the foods?
Because they're in-bred.

"You know, it's dangerous for you to be here in the frozen foods section—because you could melt all this stuff."
- Steve Martin, My Blue Heaven (1990)

Sometimes we eat when we’re hungry
Or else when we’re just in the mood,
But everyone’s habits are different
In how we relate to our food.

There are 3 meals-a-day folk as well as
The ones who skip breakfast or lunch
And grazers who nibble for most of the day
Or snackers who in-between munch.

There are people with junk food addictions
And those who shun pork, beef or fish,
While the gluten or carb-free among us
Pay attention to what’s in each dish.

As for sweets, that’s a whole other story –
When you think about ice cream or pie
Or the various candies and chocolates
Without which some could never get by.

Just consider your own way of eating
With the foods you enjoy or you sneak
And you’ll realize, if you broach the subject,
That our diets are all most unique!

(Ilene Bauer)

“Old people shouldn’t eat health foods. They need all the preservatives they can get.” – Robert Orben

“It just occurred to me that the majority of my diet is made up of the foods that my kid didn’t finish.”
Carrie Underwood

Which knight is the protector of foods?
Sir Anwrap