Engineers

How many software engineers do you need to change a light bulb?
None – it’s a hardware problem.
What do you call a train loaded with bubble gum? A chew-chew train.

How do locomotives hear? Through the engineers!
Some local engineers took a train for a service, but the vicar said it was blocking the aisle.



A train track and a motorway walk into a bar. The train track says “a pint for me, please, and one for the road.”
Some local engineers took a train for a service, but the vicar said it was blocking the aisle.
Where in the World Can You Find the Highest Concentration of Engineers?
Antarctica! Because that's where all the P. Enguins are!
How Many Engineers Does It Take to Assemble a Futon?
Three…and a psychologist!
Old Software Engineers Never Die...
They just reboot.
What's the Difference Between Mechanical & Civil Engineers?
Mechanical engineers build weapons, civil engineers build targets.
Engineers like to Solve Problems but...
If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own.