Emotional Jokes

"It's been an emotional day," said the groom. "Even the cake is in tiers."
We've been driving all day, I need a brake.

My suitcase started crying when I picked it up. I was carrying emotional baggage.
Airlines have nowadays become so cash strapped that they charge you for everything including emotional baggage.
Got emotional hearing about the role of tectonic plates in earthquakes. It was really moving.
What did the sad lamp say when plugged in?
"I finally feel better now that I’ve got an emotional outlet."
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.
When asked to define "Great" he said,
"I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"
He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.
I re-skinned my drums with the skin my faithful steed Chestnut. I want people to reflect on the emotional connection between man and beast through the art of drum solos.
But my wife says I'm just beating a dead horse.
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.
When asked to define "Great" he said,
"I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"
He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.
What is the only way one does not have to cry while cutting onions? They simply don't have to form emotional bonds with it.
All the other vegetables have always felt very emotional whenever they are near the onion.
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