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Clearly Jokes

Funny Poems
I've fallen in love- I don't know why
I've fallen in love with a girl with one eye.

I knew from the start. It was plain to see
That this wonderful girl had an eye out for me

She's charming and witty and jolly and jocular
Not what you'd expect from a girl who's monocular.

Of eyes - at the moment - she hasn't full quota
But that doesn't change things for me one iota.

It must be quite difficult if you're bereft.
If your left eye is gone and your right eye is left.

But she's made up her mind. She's made her decision.
She can see it quite clearly in 10/20 vision.

She'll not leave me waiting, not left in the lurch
If she looks slightly sideways she'll see me in church.

I'll marry my true love who's gentle and kind.
And thus prove to everyone that loves not quite blind.

(By Andrew Jefferson)
Beach Puns
I can sea clearly now.
Grocery Store Pick Up Lines
What are you doing hanging out in aisle 3? You clearly belong in aisle 9. Aisle 10 is within arm's reach but that all depends on whether or not you'll have dinner with me.
Funny Birthday Poems
I wish you something, just can’t remember,
Don’t be upset, you’re my family member.
It was clearly, on my mind,
With so many thoughts, it’s hard to find.

Visions appear of colorful balloons,
In the background I hear those fine tunes.
Near the end of the dream, I can taste a delicious cake,
It must be your birthday, as I awake.
Food Quotes
“Anyone who says that money cannot buy happiness has clearly never spent their money on pizza.”
― Andrew W.K.
Moon Puns
The moon landing is obviously fake.
The moon is clearly still up there.
Can an Australian with poor vision clearly see the moon?
No, but a "good eye might."
Tableware Puns
So I heard this joke about glass
But it clearly shouldn’t have been made
Zebra Puns
I was driving through the safari park when my sat nav said “bear left”. It was clearly a zebra.
Spotify Pick Up Lines
Guess my spotify is broken. I saw you on the top 10 of this month, but you're clearly a solid 11.
One Liners and Short Jokes
I hate it when people try to use big words when they clearly don't know their meaning.
It makes them sound so gelatinous and isosceles.
Funny Aging Quotes
"The older I get, the more clearly I remember things that never happened. - Mark Twain
Spine Puns
Stay away from Gmail if you don't want to get shivers down your spine
There's clearly a draft in there.
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