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Rid Jokes

Funny Groucho Marx Quotes
"I've got the brain of a four year old. I'll bet he was glad to be rid of it."
Mother Puns
I had a real problem when your mom got rid of that crooked chair my dad made.
I don't know why, it just never sat right with me.
Electricity Puns
I finally managed to get rid of that nasty electrical charge I’ve been carrying. I’m ex-static!”
I finally managed to get rid of that nasty electrical charge I’ve been carrying. I’m ex-static!
One Liners and Short Jokes
Cook a man a fish and you feed him for a day, but teach a man to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend.
Cat Puns
My husband was allergic to my cat so I knew I had to get rid of him… so I’m looking to rehome Gerry, he’s thirty-five and works in accounting!
Clever Jokes
Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? All they said was, “Bach, Bach, Bach …”
Strawberry Puns
When a man went to the doctor to get rid of the strawberry that was growing out of his head, the doctor told him, "Don't worry. I'll give you some cream for that".
Witch Puns
How do you get rid of a witch’s hex?
Draw a hex-a-gone.
Soap Puns
No matter what shampoo I use, I can’t seem to get rid of my dandruff.
It’s a real head scratcher.
Anti Jokes
How do you get rid of a cold?
Turn the heating on.
Pot Puns
I used to have an electric wok but I had to get rid of it
Wouldn’t run.
Hair Puns
A guy was storing all the facial hair since he was young and had created a huge pile.
When his wife told him to get rid of it, he said "no, it's a must stash".
Saxophone Puns
What did Hillary Clinton say when Bill wanted a new Saxophone?
"Not until you get rid of that HarMonica."
Halloween Pick Up Lines
Wow, You must be the pretty princess the evil queen is trying to get rid of.