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Pulled Jokes

Blonde Jokes
A blonde was cruising down the highway at breakneck speed when a cop pulled her over.
“May I see your license and registration, please?” asked the cop.
Miffed, the blonde said, “I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you took away my license and today you want me to show it to you!”
Taco Puns
Got the drive-thru girl at Taco Bell..
I pulled up and she said, "what can I get you?" And I replied, "I'll just have a moment for now."
Oral Hygiene Puns
My dentist pulled out the wrong tooth...
He said it was acci-dental.
Quotes
“Every time you feel yourself being pulled into other people’s drama, repeat these word: Not my circus, not my monkeys.”
Polish Proverb
“I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn’t a professional, the knife had butter on it.”
Rodney Dangerfield
Sports Pick Up Lines
Call me Hamstring, 'cause you've pulled.
Funny Limericks
There was an Old Man who said, 'Well!
Will nobody answer this bell?
I have pulled day and night,
Till my hair has grown white,
But nobody answers this bell!'
Mole Puns
Which tooth did Avogadro have pulled?
One of his mole-ars
Orange Puns
Why did the orange get pulled over while driving?
He kept peeling out.
Pig Puns
I entered my pig into a pig race but he pulled a ham string.
Beach Puns
I used to search for clams on the beach
But then I pulled a mussel.
Camel Puns
I saw a lady riding a camel and being pulled by a truck... It was a camel tow
Corn Puns
Somebody was doing a speech and said, "This might be corny," and pulled out a couple of canned corns. Guess what happened next?
Total pundemonium.
Thanksgiving Puns
Made a whole bunch of dad jokes at Thanksgiving dinner...
I pulled out all the Pops!
One Liners and Short Jokes
A woman says to the dentist "I don't know which is worse having a tooth pulled or having a Baby."
The dentist says "Well make up your mind I gotta adjust the chair!"