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Metal Jokes

Mouth Puns
Did you hear about the guy who got a metal jaw replacement?
I think he just did it for a tin chin.
Utensils Puns
My wife was scratching the glass jar with a metal spoon...
It was jarring!!!
I was on the road yesterday with my metal detector looking for some cutlery....
I found plenty of spoons and knives but I didn't stop, until I hit a fork in the road.
What did the cutlery maker say when he lost some metal?
Silverware?!
History Puns
In which battle did the soldiers form a queue outside a metal box?
The battle of Portaloo.
Frankenstein Puns
Why doesn’t Frankenstein go on airplanes?
He can’t get past the airport metal detector.
Table Puns
My wife chose a new dining table with a metal frame instead of a wooden one
I complimented her on picking an unteak.
Thanksgiving Puns
A guy ate only metal bars for thanksgiving
He was gratefull
Witch Puns
What did the Wicked Witch of the West say when she extracted metal from ore?
I’m smelting!
Marriage Puns
Two metal workers got married....
It was a beautiful welding.
Tableware Puns
My wife was scratching the glass jar with a metal spoon...
It was jarring!!!
Band Puns
I'm starting a death metal band for people with Celiac's Disease
We're called "Gluten for Punishment."
Which heavy metal band is Santa's favourite?
Sleigh-er.
Mother Puns
My mom is a metalurgist
I asked her the other day: "Which metal do you prefer to work with? Gold or silver?"

She said: "Either ore."
Closet Puns
I had a few doubts about buying a big metal cabinet to store all my valuables.
Turns out... it was a safe purchase.