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Lots Jokes

Funny Birthday Poems
This birthday wish may be late,
And it may be over in a flash,
But its message is good anytime,
Because it comes with lots of cash.
Zombie Puns
What do you call a zombie with lots of kids?
A mom-ster.
Ghost Puns
When the ghost blew his nose, lots of boo-gers came out.
Monster Puns
What do you call a lineup of food with lots of garlicky dishes?
Buffet the Vampire Slayer!
Funny Health Quotes
"There's lots of people in this world who spend so much time watching their health that they haven't the time to enjoy it." - Josh Billings
Crocodile Puns
Alligators ask lots of questions, they'd make great interri-gators.
History Puns
My history teacher is a communist, so I made lots of references to the Soviet Union in my essay.
I got full marx.
Orange Puns
The Paddington bears don’t eat lots of marmalade sandwiches because they are already stuffed.
Mushroom Puns
There are lots of funny jokes about mushrooms that can give you stitches. However, you need to be patient enough because they need time to grow on you.
Garden Quotes
"Gardening requires lots of water - most of it in the form of perspiration."
- Lou Erickson
Elf Puns
What would you call an elf with lots of money?
W-elfy!
Pea Puns
I went to see a beet poet the other day. There were lots of hip peas there.
Lots of peas work as spies. Espea-onage is very common.
Funny Animal Poems That Rhyme
Lots of people have a rug.
Very few have a Pug.

(E.B White)
Garden Puns
I used to make lots of money clearing leaves from gardens. I was raking it in.